Interview Doug Stanhope has a great fist-fuck joke for you

Striking a tone somewhere between ironic bemusement and outright disgust, comedian Doug Stanhope traffics in the sort of caustic social commentary plied by George Carlin and Bill Hicks—though neither Carlin nor Hicks ever incited actual riots, as Stanhope has been known to do. Extending beyond just cracking wise about taboo stuff like child pornography (though he does that, too), Stanhope’s fearlessness—some of which must be attributed to alcohol—often extends to out-and-out incitement, like the 2009 Leeds Festival performance where he started off by insulting the Royal Family, a salvo quickly answered by a chorus of boos and a volley of water bottles. But Stanhope is more than just a provocateur (though he is that, too): He’s puts his money where his foul mouth is, whether it’s seriously considering a 2008 presidential run or offering $25,000 toward an abortion for Bristol Palin. Before Stanhope's show at the Varsity Theater on Friday, The A.V. Club spoke to him about pushing buttons, doing DMT with his former Man Show co-host Joe Rogan, and why he’s done with politics.

The A.V. Club: Is there an ideal venue you like to play?

Doug Stanhope: Well, if it's too big, my audience gets too fucking out of control. I'll play occasional theaters, but once there's a balcony and people are that far away, they start yelling shit, and you can't control the audience. Get more than 300 people in my audience, and it's just going to turn into a fucking yell-fest.

AVC: With crowds who are already sympathetic to your worldview, do you feel the need to push them that much further?

DS: On some levels. A lot of people like me for all the wrong reasons. You're always going to disappoint somebody, even if they already like you. Some of them want more political shit, others want you to talk about the New World Order—or they want more fist-fuck material. When you work music venues, you don't get bachelorette parties just stumbling in like you would at a comedy club, and it's always preaching to the choir. So yeah, it's fun to try and find their weak spots. You don't have to guess whether they like you.

AVC: One of the most notorious examples of that was the Austin show you did with Alex Jones. 

DS: That's the best thing I have on tape. [Laughs.] It's at Capitol City Comedy Club, and Alex Jones was there with Kevin Booth. I said, “Hey, if you want, you can introduce me. That'd be cool, 'cause we're filming”—you know, because he's a staple of the Austin community. So he went up and tried to cram every conspiracy theory he's ever learned into nine minutes. [Imitating Jones.] “They’re all the same, from Saddam Hussein to Pol Pot, the Ayatollah to Ho Chi Minh. We propped them up, then we sent over our boys to the meat grinder, and you're all going to end up in fucking prison!” Some guy in the audience was like, “You're killing my buzz, man.” [Laughs.] People are yelling at each other, and it turns into this chaotic breakdown of screaming, and Alex is right in some guy's face in the front row like he's gonna fight him. Then he's just fucking, “All right, here's Doug Stanhope.” I just walked into this fucking melee. It was wicked good.

AVC: Speaking of Alex Jones, Joe Rogan had a memorable guest spot on his show last year extolling the virtues of DMT—something you and he have done together. But according to your stand-up routine, you didn’t enjoy it as much as he did?

DS: Yeah, that's the only time I've done that. I don't need to know how fucking life ends in such great detail—or the meaning of it, ’cause you still gotta sit through it. Why learn the end of the movie?  Rogan's done it several times; he's a stronger man than I. Some people enjoy that reminder that life is all a joke. I don't, because the joke's not that good. [Laughs.]

AVC: You got a lot of attention in 2008 for launching savingbristol.com (since deactivated), which was dedicated to getting Bristol Palin an abortion—which she obviously doesn’t need anymore. What’s happened to that fund now?

DS: It's now been taken over by the Lilith Fund. They provide abortions for people who otherwise couldn't afford it. This year I'll be donating in the name of that abortion doctor killer [Scott Roeder], with the specific notation that, “This is an abortion that wouldn't have been had, had it not been for you, sir. So not only have you killed an abortion doctor, but you've also killed a baby.” Money in my will also will go to those who want abortions. 

AVC: The website was sort of your reintroduction to politics after your would-be presidential bid in 2008. Are you still interested in getting into the political arena? 

DS: No. Not for myself, not whatsoever. I wasn't really then. [Laughs.] It seemed like it could be fun, but all the fun was sucked out of it when we started to wrap our heads around all the red tape involved—paperwork, bullshit, the risk. I had a full team of people who were as equally prepared and competent as I was, sitting in the same room—or bar—as me, all shrugging our shoulders. We got to the place where you realized that if you forgot to carry the one on your financial paperwork, there are six-figure fines for just a small infraction. And I fuck up way too much in a day to risk that.

AVC: You’ve been called “the heir to Bill Hicks.” What do you think about the way Hicks’ legacy has grown in the past few years?

DS: You know, if I fucking died, and left any legacy, I have so many friends—that really are my good friends—that I wouldn't want to say a fucking word about me. They're fucking idiots, and everything they say should be suspect. I want to leave that in my fucking will. [Laughs.] They're not the people you can trust. They're the people who kinda make it up as they go. The Cynthia True book on Hicks [American Scream: The Bill Hicks Story] was a complete fucking fluff piece. When they did this thing in Aspen for it, there were guys in the book who talked to me, and one of the Houston comics—who's not in the business anymore, but was close with [Hicks] back then—said, “I tried to tell her all this stuff about Bill Hicks kicking a hooker out of a moving car at 30 mph, and she didn't want to hear any of it.” It's like, what are you writing? [Laughs.] Her book was like when fucking Hanson was the flavor of the month, and immediately there's some fluff-piece biography of them within a day of their becoming famous. Or Kelly Clarkson. That's exactly how it read.

AVC: You’re probably one of the most famous comedians to ever come out of Bisbee, Ariz. What’s the vibe like there?

DS: I'm making up T-shirts that say, “Support Gentrification: Gentrify Bisbee.” [Laughs.] With the communist fist with the Rolex on the wrist. It's an artist town, but the art is all a lot of turquoise belt buckles, shit like that. I've found that I don't necessarily mingle well with artists of that nature. “That's a great metal sculpture. I have a nice fist-fuck joke. I guess we have nothing else to say.”