Back to School Off the wall: What your stereotypical dorm poster actually says about you

In all likelihood, your dorm room is the first place you've ever lived where you're free to make the decorating decisions without parental approval. (Apologies to any orphaned freshman.) But since most residence-hall associations continue to frown upon full-wall murals, your options for self-expression through decor are limited to stuff that can you take with you when you move out—like posters. Picking the right posters can be tricky, and rest assured you're not the first person to fall for a 39-by-55-inch frame from Eraserhead or Amelie. (Best to start melting you special little snowflakes now.) Thousands of other students have defined themselves through these posters—so if you don't want to end up looking like those jackasses, best to not go with any of the following. 

Anything with Bob Marley's face on it
Comes in several variations: Pensive Marley (taken from the Legend cover), musical Marley (onstage or just jamming), and Marley taking a particularly rough hit off a huge spliff.
What you think it says about you: "I believe in spreading a message of love and personal freedom."
What it actually says: "I also believe in spreading the stench caused by an ill-advised attempt at dreadlocks. And I was too stoned to notice the second shot in this sequence has been digitally reversed."

John Belushi in Animal House
As the foremost slob in John Landis' snobs vs. slobs classic, Belushi embodies a collegiate male fantasy: being a permanently wasted human tornado that eats what he wants, chugs Jack Daniel's like iced tea, stays enrolled for seven years, and still goes on to become a U.S. senator.
What you think it says about you: "I will drink and fuck my way through the next four years and still come out looking like a lovable scamp."
What it actually says: "Alcohol has never touched these lips. Also, keep me away from all ladders and sorority-house windows."

Audrey Hepburn in Breakfast At Tiffany's
The jewelry, the elegant black dress, the long-stem cigarette holder: All symbols of urban sophistication that hide something darker about that "daring, darling Holly Golightly."
What you think it says about you: "I may be an extrovert, but my personality comes in layers." 
What it actually says: "I haven't seen this movie all the way through. Where does she get all that money?"

Robert Indiana, "LOVE"
A testament to the pop art movement's idealization of advertising and mass production, Indiana's logo for a concept that doesn't need a logo began life as a Christmas card before being repurposed as public sculpture, a postage stamp, and countless posters. 
What you think it says about you: "I am knowledgeable about art."   
What it actually says: "I am not knowledgeable about art." (See also: Any Andy Warhol print you can buy at Target, even though Warhol would have loved that you picked up toilet paper and Marilyn in the same trip. For a non-pop art example, see Vincent Van Gogh's "The Starry Night.")

Storm Thorgerson, "Pink Floyd: Back Catalogue"
A painful visual pun conceived by album artist Thorgerson, featuring a handful of his iconic Floyd covers lovingly re-created on the bare backs of six bathing beauties. 
What you think it says about you: "I appreciate the complexities of albums like Wish You Were Here and The Dark Side Of The Moon."
What it actually says: "I also appreciate the frankness of Sir Mix-A-Lot's 'Baby Got Back.'"

Albert Einstein's Birthday Greetings
In a moment of surprising candor and humanity, the world's greatest physicist and the man behind the general and special theories of relativity gets caught sticking his tongue out at a photographer.  
What you think it says about you: “I have an enviable work-life balance: I work hard, but I’m not uptight about it.”
What it actually says: “I’m like Einstein, if Einstein smoked lots of pot and played Wii Tennis all day.”

Pulp Fiction theatrical poster
Quentin Tarantino's low-brow art film/high-brow B-movie distilled to its most lurid details, manifesting themselves in a handgun, a pack of Red Apples, and the intimation of sexual congress with Uma Thurman.
What you think it says about you: “I am a film buff.”
What it actually says: “I am a connoisseur of gratuitous violence.” (Anybody with a Boondock Saints or Fight Club poster probably misinterpreted the violence in those films as well.) 

Tanya Chalkin, "Kiss"
Chalkin challenges the viewer to answer the following: Where does art start and softcore porn begin? Is this a one-time experiment or a long-term relationship? Am I pressing your buttons, puritan? Am I? Huh? 
What you think it says about you: “I might be a horny college student, but at least I appreciate the perplexing, ever-wondrous ways of women.”
What it actually says: “I don't plan on ever bringing a girl back to my dorm—not if she's sober, at least.”