J.K. Rowling sues former employee for buying too many cats, the witchiest crime of all

Suggesting that Grindelwald isn’t the only one out there committing crimes against the wizarding world right now, BBC News reports that author J.K. Rowling is suing a former assistant for, among other things, supposedly using a company credit card to buy herself a couple of cats. (The News refuses to note whether the…

Jerry Seinfeld thinks "we love the crawl-back" with guys like Louis CK

It’s a Seinfeld joke that’s proven eerily prescient over the last 20 years: Jerry Seinfeld always seems to break even. The occasional foray into Bee-GI aside, Seinfeld has been a steady figure in the comedy landscape for decades now, even as the wider stand-up scene evolves, and his contemporaries—Roseanne Barr, Louis…

Please enjoy this video of a state senator adorably trying weed for the first time

While our current, social media-infused age means that there’s a good chance most people will have their first experience with weed thoroughly documented and shared for posterity, older generations have had to let these memories fade away with the passage of time. One middle-aged Utah lawmaker, though, has shown it’s…

Horny 4 Horror applauds the practical effects of The Stuff and other ’80s cult hits

“Critical world-building, smart characterization, and fun interaction between good friends.” That’s what Friends At The Table promises, and week by week it delivers it in spades. While other actual play podcasts can get bogged down in game mechanics or just spend too much time goofing around, game master Austin Walker…

YouTube is down, so please stand by for the total collapse of human civilization

Look, we don’t know about you, but we rely on YouTube for a lot of shit over the course of a day. What was the theme song to that TV show we watched three times in the 1980s? YouTube’s got it. Need to watch another human being play through the entirety of Chex Quest? YouTube has your back. Children having annoying…

Tom DeLonge's UFO organization seems to be having money problems, unless it's all a big conspiracy

According to a report from Ars Technica, the weird UFO research group/art collective co-founded by former Blink-182 member Tom DeLonge known as To The Stars Academy has dug itself a $37.4 million deficit, bringing its longterm viability as a weird UFO research group/art collective into question. The organization is…

Here's a cool playlist of music perfectly timed to perform CPR to

There is nothing quite like staring down the barrel of your own mortality by thinking about what you’d choose as your last meal on earth or the final song you’d ever hear. These are deeply personal choices, difficult and unpleasant to think about. We regret to inform you that that decision might be made for you, and…

Walmart invented a cart that monitors your biometrics, because hell is real and we live there

On a ranking of which companies we should feel comfortable trusting with our personal data, Walmart deserves to be somewhere at the bottom near Facebook and The Trump Organization. There’s just something unseemly about giving any sort of information to Walmart, like you’re a kid in a horror story getting tricked into…

Notify the President Of The Internet: The Tiny Fuppets are coming back tomorrow

Answering the modest wishes of any number of Sumol-sipping fans, the Tiny Fuppets are finally coming back. It’s been six long years since Scott Gairdner (Funny Or Die, Moonbeam City) last posted a video cataloging the Portugeuse-voiced antics of his beloved online animation darlings, but now that time has come around…

7 years after graduating from Hogwarts, Daniel Radcliffe got a real job at The New Yorker

In the Harry Potter books, people who graduate from a magic school like Hogwarts tend to get fantastical jobs like dragon breeder, wand salesperson, or customer service warlock, but it seems like they rarely get the sort of “real” jobs that us normal people get. Recently, though, Daniel Radcliffe decided to change…

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