Here’s what’s up in the world of television for Sunday, January 5. All times are Eastern.
TOP PICK
Downton Abbey (PBS, 9 p.m.): Ah, the promise of a new January, the glory of a calendar as unblemished as a freshly fallen snow. A whole 365 days of potential—aw, fuck, Downton Abbey’s back already? Goodbye boundless optimism, hello inevitably disappointing (though handsomely staged and photographed) period melodrama. Myles McNutt's ominous warnings aside, Sonia Saraiya looks on the bright side: At least the first four days of the year turned out okay.
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The Simpsons (Fox, 8 p.m.): “Homer Vs. Lisa And The 8th Commandment” gets a contemporary update, replacing the now-quaint notion of stealing cable with a more nefarious media crime: online movie piracy. Dennis Perkins, Last Video-Store Clerk Standing, reminds you to be kind—don’t torrent this episode.
Bob’s Burgers (Fox, 8:30 p.m.): Having already formed her first boy-band crush (basically against her will), Louise reluctantly undergoes another preteen rite of passage: A slumber party. Pilot Viruet can’t figure out what the big deal is—she wishes she could sleep over at the Belchers' every night.
Revenge (ABC, 9 p.m.): Obviously Emily’s not dead. Carrie Raisler will play along with the show’s charade, but she knows full well that no non-zombified, mummified, vampirified, or Frankensteined corpse has ever successfully taken REEEEEEEEEEEVEEEEEEEEEEENGE!
Family Guy (Fox, 9 p.m.): If you’re having “Peter Problems,” talk to a doctor to see if Family Guy is right for you. Contact an Eric Thurm for any “Peter Problems” that may last longer than 22 minutes.
The Good Wife (CBS, 9:30 p.m.): Alicia represents a band that’s seeking to correct a copyright violation. It’s not The Rolling Stones, is it? If it is, David Sims wants Alicia, Mick Jagger, et al. to know he’s really sorry about that Following review that was just the lyrics of “Beast Of Burden” presented verbatim.