Here’s what’s up in the world of television for Sunday, August 10. All times are Eastern.
Clone High (3 p.m.): It goes like this: Some 30 years ago, shadowy employees of the federal government cloned history’s greatest thinkers and leaders, assuring that these “amusing genetic copies” would hit puberty at an all-time peak for pop-cultural archness. Unfortunately, their timing was just off, trapping Clone High’s adolescent versions of Abraham Lincoln, Joan Of Arc, and Mahatma Gandhi in a world they never made: MTV in 2003, where the show quickly withered and died. But then the careers of its creators—Scrubs and Cougar Town guy Bill Lawrence, Lego Movie duo Phil Lord and Chris Miller—rose like the political prospects of a young, x-zone-fortified Lincoln. Enchanting and engaging, Clone High reviews by Caroline Framke will run through September
Shark Week (Discovery Channel, 8 p.m.): Ensuring once more that great whites will not rise from the ocean to punish humanity for its insolence, Discovery rolls its annual televised genuflection to the toothy ones. Watch and appease our gilled overlords, lest they rise from the depths and tear you limb from limb before you get a chance to see the second-season premiere of the recap show Shark After Dark.
2014 Teen Choice Awards (Fox, 8 p.m.): An award show that won’t truly live up to its name until it starts honoring actual teen choices like “Just wanting to be left alone” and “Wishing you’d treat them like a real adult, God, Dad!”
Fat Guys In The Woods (Weather Channel, 10 p.m.): According to official Weather Channel copy, “This show is not about making fun of fat guys. It’s about giving regular Joes the chance to do something they’ve only seen done by Brad Pitt-types.” Whatever, Weather Channel: We all know this is just going to be the survival-series equivalent of a Benny Hill chase.
Farscape (11 a.m.): Alasdair Wilkins goes “Into The Lion’s Den,” which probably doesn’t contain any lions because, you know… space?
Food Network Star (Food, 9 p.m.): A new champion is crowned in the season finale, and that champion must immediately decide if they will follow the teachings of Food Network jedi like Alton Brown or hop into Guy Fieri’s Sith convertible and take the hyperspace jump to the Flavor System.
Gym Rescue (Spike, 10 p.m.): The true sign of the U.S. economy’s recovery will be when Spike runs out of types of businesses to rescue on reality shows. Hasn’t happened yet, though.
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles III (Disney XD, 8 p.m.): Depending on how the weekend box office goes, the movie where Leonardo, Michelangelo, Donatello, and Raphael time travel to samurai days just might have a chance at unloading the “franchise killer” albatross that’s hung around its neck for so many years.
To Be Or Not To Be (TCM, 8 p.m.): In the midst of the second World War, Ernst Lubitsch managed to make a comedy with Nazis, paving the way for Mel Brooks (and Brooks’ own take on the story of theatrical stars infiltrating and sabotaging the German occupation of Poland.)
MLB Baseball: Nationals at Braves (ESPN, 8 p.m.): Dominance of the National League East hangs in the balance as Washington heads to Atlanta, a phrase that’s certainly worked its way into someone’s weird Civil War fan-fiction at some point, we’re sure. (“General Washington found himself flummoxed: A war between the states? And just why has my trusty mount been replaced by something called ‘Princess Fluttershy’?”)
“What’s the deal with all of these tattoo shows?” you might ask yourself. Allow Sonia Saraiya to let you know what the deal is with all of these tattoo shows, because she’s seen them all, and has registered her opinions about them in easily digestible capsule form. Join us, won’t you, for a very special For Our Consideration investigation: Every show about tattooing, reviewed.
Outlander: Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya has tripped through a rift in the space-time continuum and found herself in 18th century Scotland. Her only hope of returning to our timeline is by getting her Outlander reviews out to the largest audience possible. So, please: Read about Outlander. If not for your own sake, then for Kayla’s.