Blake Shelton: Red River Blue

In the realm of pretty-boy contemporary country singers, Blake Shelton isn’t as cheesy as Keith Urban or as manly as Brad Paisley. He’s in the creamy, mushy middle, which is exactly where he aims on Red River Blue. Affecting the popular guise of the redneck gentleman—he’ll whisper sweet nothings in your ear, darlin,’ but that don’t mean he don’t care about trucks and freedom—Shelton favors midtempo, deadly dull ballads specializing in the sorts of earnest pledges to fidelity and domesticity that husbands hardly ever make in real life. On “Honey Bee,” Shelton promises to be “strong and steady.” The faintly soulful “Ready To Roll” extols the virtues of munching on “tater chips” and listening to “laidback country tunes on the radio” on the couch at home. All that’s missing is a song about promising to pick up milk on the way home from work.