Last night while you were watching Joffrey’s wedding on Game Of Thrones, another ceremony catering to the whims of teenagers played out on MTV—albeit one where the “Biggest #WTF Moment” was Leonardo DiCaprio driving a car poorly. Still, the MTV Movie Awards certainly didn’t lack for trying when it came to attempts to generate its own viral meltdowns. Conan O’Brien’s cold open was a self-aware nod to the fact that the entire show is about parading famous faces for the kids to scream at, in which the host set about landing 50 celebrity cameos—everyone from Ice Cube to Russell Crowe to Martin Scorsese. Elsewhere in this celebration honoring the year’s many cinematic achievements, Grumpy Cat wore Pharrell’s hat and Zac Efron went shirtless.
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As for the winners, it was a clean sweep for The Hunger Games: Catching Fire, which took Movie Of The Year and top acting prizes for its leads, while the only parallel with the Oscars was a win for Jared Leto, for Best Onscreen Transformation. Leto took what will likely be his final opportunity to give a speech acknowledging the abiding inspiration of all those who continue to battle AIDS, as well as of 30 Seconds To Mars. Meanwhile, MTV took the opportunity to play “I Can Transform Ya” by that noted activist for “living how you want to live” regardless of what society says, Chris Brown.
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Finally, echoing the alternate world that the MTV Movie Awards inhabits, the cast of Entourage was on hand to present Mark Wahlberg with his Generation Award—which Wahlberg deemed the “You’re Too Fucking Old To Come Back Award,” in a speech littered with F-bombs. Wahlberg closed by recognizing that it was also Palm Sunday, saying, “I love the Lord.” Then he got really offensive and declared the Entourage movie “the movie of the year next year, I guarantee it.”
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Anyway, here’s the list of everyone who took home a trophy for their fine work of being someone that teenagers like—even if, in Mila Kunis’ case, they probably technically should have been recognized last year. But like Conan said, it was mostly about getting her up there so kids could go “woo.”
Movie Of The Year: The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Best Female Performance: Jennifer Lawrence, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Best Male Performance: Josh Hutcherson, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Best Breakthrough Performance: Will Poulter, We’re The Millers
Best Villain: Mila Kunis, Oz: The Great And Powerful
Best Comedic Performance: Jonah Hill, The Wolf Of Wall Street
Best Scared-As-Shit Performance: Brad Pitt, World War Z
Best Shirtless Performance: Zac Efron, That Awkward Moment
Best Onscreen Transformation: Jared Leto, Dallas Buyers Club
Best Onscreen Duo: Vin Diesel & Paul Walker, Fast & Furious 6
Best Kiss: Emma Roberts, Jennifer Aniston, and Will Poulter, We’re The Millers
Best Fight: Orlando Bloom and Evangeline Lilly vs. Orcs, The Hobbit: The Desolation Of Smaug
#WTF Moment: Leonardo DiCaprio, The Wolf Of Wall Street
Best Musical Moment: Backstreet Boys, et. al, This Is The End
Best Cameo: Rihanna, This Is The End
Best Hero: Henry Cavill, Man Of Steel
Favorite Character: Beatrice “Tris” Prior, Divergent