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Justin Bieber hit with his very first paternity suit, is a man now

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Like witnessing the gentle fawn taking its first wobbly steps toward becoming a full-grown stag, Justin Bieber has slowly begun sloughing off his billowy swoops of golden fur and developing the tough leather hide of a man—a maturation evidenced of late by his deepening singing voice, his occasional back-sass at the dinner table, and now, his very first paternity suit. Star magazine (via the New York Post) reports that a 20-year-old California woman has asked the court to demand that Bieber submit to a paternity test to prove that he’s the father of her baby, which she says is the result of she and Bieber having sex backstage at one of his concerts. Of course, Bieber’s camp has flatly denied the allegations, most likely owing to the fact that Justin Bieber’s every waking moment is meticulously accounted for in an Excel spreadsheet, and the chance that Bieber was allowed the liberty of sleeping with a random fan who could destroy everything by his vast team of public image overlords seems highly unlikely. Still, a court hearing is scheduled for later this year, officially heralding Justin Bieber’s transition from innocent teen idol to all-grown-up pop star, and paving the way for a class action lawsuit on behalf of every woman who achieved immaculate conception after seeing Never Say Never.