Regal Cinemas enters the race to ruin movie theaters with your phone

Per Variety, news of the new app comes just a few days after bargain bin streamer Tubi did something similar, as more and more brands appear to be embracing the idea that human beings, when left to their own devices, simply can’t be trusted to pick movies for themselves. These in-app apps (sorry, we’re as glum about the total destruction of the English language here as the rest of you) allow ChatGPT users to summon up a specific AI responder within the wider AI world that will give them movie recommendations, information about movie showtimes, ticket availability, and more. (And then filter them to Regal’s purchasing system, natch.)

And, sure, you could literally do all of that through Regal’s web site, or, hypothetically, Regal’s own phone app, without suffering the basic indignity of handing the question of whether you want to see Super Mario Galaxy again over to The Machines. But this proliferation of ChatGPT apps seems to indicate that more companies are coming to believe that AI is a quicksand bog that we’re all sinking in, so they might as well make the drowning a bit more efficient. (Executives responsible for the app used less “choking to death on clinging wet sand” imagery in their own descriptions, calling the app a way to “turn AI conversations into movie tickets,” but we prefer our framing.) Among other things, the app promises users recommendations backed by “real-time, accurate data,” which definitely sounds better and less wasteful than talking to another human being and asking “Hey, seen anything good lately?” The sole saving grace we can think of is that Regal isn’t asking its users to use the app while literally seated in the theater, but, hey: There’s still a lot of future left to suffer through, so who knows what tomorrow might bring?