If Couples Retreat's position at the top of the box office this weekend proves anything, it's that America is in the mood to laugh! Unfortunately, America has no sense of humor. How else can you explain the nation's collective embrace of a movie whose funniest joke is an over-eager, greasy, be-speedoed yoga instructor?
Of course, there are other theories. Maybe all of America wants a vacation—and the closest we can get is watching Vince Vaughn play Guitar Hero in a bar at some resort in Bora Bora. (We are sad.) Or maybe all of America is in a terrible monogamous relationship, and we all just want to see those terrible relationships hilariously played out on screen by a bunch of bare-bones caricatures. And even though our misery just gets deeper and darker with each passing moment spent chained to each other, we should all cling to our partners out of fear of eating alone at Applebee's—at least that's what made chronic cheaters Jon Favreau and Kristen Davis stay together in Couples Retreat.
Marriage! It totally sucks, you know? Couples Retreat does! They even put together a helpful (and soo-funny-cause-it's-true!) quiz on the movie's website to help miserable couples (which are all couples, am I right?). A sample:
Get it? Cause it's like women are always like, "I'm gonna take this relationship quiz online," and men are all like, "I'm gonna do that too, but pretend I'm not doing it for some reason." Venus, meet Mars!
They could simplify this quiz by just having one choice:
Are you an idiot?
• Yes
Idiocy is gender neutral. Then there's this question: