Access Hollywood Extends The Borders Of Hollywood To Include Beijing

By Amelie Gillette  |  August 19, 2008 | 4:27pm
Aux Features Hater

It's the second (or third? Who even knows anymore? This is going to last for the rest of your life.) week of the Olympics, and that low-grade Olympic fever you were running on August 8th has officially progressed into Olympics mono: complete with swollen lymph nodes, debilitating fatigue, and general exhaustion that covers you like a leaden blanket.

It wasn't NBC's 24-hour, multi-channel coverage of the actual sporting events that did you in–catching a few minutes here and there of Dressage or MichaelPhelpswimming (they're re-naming the sport after him) or Fencing can be enjoyable, no matter how much the commentators try to ruin it with their incessant, unnecessary, throttle-worthy blathering. No, it was the seemingly endless supply of color pieces about Beijing–they have karaoke there!–and reports about what Olympians eat or have on their ipods, not to mention Al Roker and Matt Lauer's patented funtime Olympics comedy pieces that pushed you over the edge.

So, exactly how much Olympics coverage is too much? When Billy Bush, of Access Hollywood and being-a-brain-stem-with-glass-eyes fame, is there:

What's it like to be a varnished marionette with a brain chip emblazoned only with the word "duh" and covering the Olympics? It's, um, weird, especially with all the Chinese children/symbols of young capitalism running around.

From Billy's blog:

Last night, while shooting our show, a woman was standing in the crowd, holding this baby. I took a picture. Many others did too… this baby represents the youth of this country… steeped in history but young in capitalism and open society. There is innocence to all the people in China. They are very gracious and optimistic, patient and hopeful.

That baby says it all to me. I've tried to explain it.

I am currently waiting for Phelps at the side door to the "Water Cube"… an interview is my quest. The great thing about covering the Olympics, if you want to do it right, is you have to be willing to run, sweat, linger by a door, hustle and bump. We're doing that and you're all watching. Thanks.

Here's a picture of the baby that nearly caused Billy Bush's glass eyes to fog up:

No, thank you, Billy Bush, for being wise enough to point out that China's children are China's future. If that kid hadn't been wearing that Olympics headband, his symbolism would have been totally lost on me.

Next week, Billy sees a leaf gently blowing in the breeze in front of the Olympics logo outside of the Water Cube, and expounds for two sentences about how the leaf represents nature, and the Olympics logo represents the Olympics–both of which exist, side by side, in patient, gracious China.

 
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