Last night’s Watchmen finale didn’t answer every lingering question we had—how could it? It had a very long to-do list, and it had to check items off that list and be pretty great at the same time. Yet mercifully, the invaluable supplement Peteypedia managed to answer one of the biggest, most meaningful questions after “See How They Fly” ended: The identity and whereabouts of Lube Man, pictured above.
It did so in a single “file”: a memo announcing the firing of the man behind Peteypedia himself, Agent Dale Petey.
The two relevant paragraphs are below—though trust me, it’s worth reading in full.
(Former) Agent Petey’s computer folder will be deleted from the share server in 48 hours, after which time his meandering, self-indulgent memos (he certainly puts the “I” in FBI) and ridiculous documents will only exist as hard copy. Let the legacy of “Peteypedia” be an example of how NOT to conduct professional electronic discourse. Moving forward, I expect to see only the most succinct analysis and most pertinent information in your folders, not exhaustive summations of television programs as if they were in any way relevant to anything, nor schematics of pornographic space-age sex toys. Understood?
Similarly, a maintenance crew will be boxing up the contents of Petey’s office later this afternoon. Anyone interested in taking anything from the stacks of media, ephemera, and straight-up junk cluttering his workspace — multiple copies of Rorschach’s Journal, hundreds of “comic” books (why our society is still so obsessed with pirates is beyond me) and a jug of what appears to be some kind of canola oil, help yourselves. Let the record reflect that I have personally removed a new album by The Nine Inch Nails entitled The Manhattan Project, as my son listens to that garbage, it is rotting his brain, and it brought me great personal delight to smash this “music” into pieces.