Conner O'Malley's latest missive has him smoking 500 cigarettes to "raise awareness" for 5G

By Randall Colburn  |  March 31, 2020 | 2:46pm
Aux Features Comedy
Conner O'Malley's latest missive has him smoking 500 cigarettes to "raise awareness" for 5G
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Absolute madman Conner O’Malley, who we last saw terrorizing New York City’s Hudson Yards, is back, this time to smoke 500 cigarettes in an effort to “raise awareness” for 5G technology. While O’Malley’s love for the corporate behemoth that is Verizon is well-documented, his embrace of T-Mobile is a new development, given that he said he would “make them pay” back in 2017.

Armed with his trusty selfie stick and a plastic big filled with smokes, O’Malley cruises a bridge at night while blasting cigs, screaming about how 5G will save the “United fucking States” from the “contravirus” and thanking Jack Ryan for “making sure we are safe.” 5G, he declares, will finally make eBaum’s World “a real planet.”

In the kind of twist we’ve come to expect from O’Malley’s work, everything changes once he smokes his 500th cigarette. With 5G status is “activated,” he’s soon swept into a bleary, feverish world of Instagram hotties and conspiracy theories, specifically one involving Jeffrey Epstein, Burlington Coat Factory, and COVID-19.

Watch how it all shakes out below.

For as manic as it is, the clip deftly satirizes the billionaire defenders flooding politics and social media, as well as our breathless reliance on technology that, by offering unfettered access to unvetted information, has slowly eroded our flimsy grasp of what’s reality and what’s fiction.

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