Disney computers select Mr. Toad's Wild Ride as next theme park attraction suited for film profit expansion

With the benefit of a freshly installed CPU that allows it to ignore narrative up to 10 times faster, the Disney supercomputer tasked with analyzing existing studio properties for further franchising opportunities and additional quotients of family fun has selected Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride as the next theme park attraction to be compressed into a feature film profit generator. The long-running driving simulacrum—which involves placing humans in a conveyance that turns at sharp angles among sets decorated with representations of woodland animals—is itself an adaptation of Disney’s 1949 film The Adventures Of Ichabod And Mr. Toad, meaning another film already represents up to three established areas of potential sales. Much less profitably and therefore importantly, both ride and film are in turn adaptations of Kenneth Grahame’s The Wind In The Willows—a bound lump of paper which was used to pacify children, before creating entertainment became the work of spreadsheets and software—that is nevertheless still of interest to certain niche quadrants of nostalgic collectors and "readers."