Noah Bryant is a four-year-old from Brooklyn who’s managed to pull off one of the greatest childhood coups to date. In a monumental act of payback for every kid who’s ever been refused a treat while out doing chores with their parents, Bryant somehow managed to order a haul of SpongeBob SquarePants-branded popsicles so enormous that it cost his mom $2,618.85.
Jennifer Bryant, Noah’s mom, posted about the massive order on Instagram, including details and a great photo of the kid in question, smiling gleefully while standing on a bunch of shipping boxes and holding one of his many, many SpongeBob popsicles. The post explains that Noah placed the order—which consisted of 51 cases or 918 individual popsicles—on Amazon and had them sent to his aunt’s house.
Since Amazon wouldn’t take a return and Jennifer is a mother of three and enrolled as a social work student at New York University, a friend and former classmate set up a GoFundMe to try to regain her losses. The fundraiser’s goal was set at $2,619.00, but the hoped-for 15 cent profit has been overshot by quite a bit. At the time of writing, the campaign is up to $23,886. Last week, Bryant wrote a note on the page thanking people for their “mind-blowing generosity and support” and stated that “all additional donations will go toward Noah’s education and additional supports.”
While we’re glad that things have worked out for the Bryants, we do worry about the lesson other four-year-olds will take from this story once they inevitably come across it while reading the newspaper and drawing on a bubble pipe, as children are wont to do after a hard day’s work. How long will it be until we hear that some kid, fueled by a love of the SpongeBob Cinematic Universe and a keen eye for profit-generating online stories, orders thousands of dollars in Patrick Star popsicles?
[via Fox 11]
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