Further Adventures In Press Releases

By Amelie Gillette  |  October 9, 2006 | 5:54pm
Aux Features Hater

From the DEA:

(Washington, D.C.) The Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) is giving teens the information they need to "pass on pot." Stumbleweed, a new on-line magazine for teens, illustrates the consequences of marijuana and provides teens with relevant facts about the impact of marijuana…The magazine is an addition to DEA's award winning teen website, www.justthinktwice.com, which has received 49 million "hits" since its inception in August, 2005.

"Pass on pot"? "Hits"? This press release is four quotation marks away from being ironic. Then again, the kids today like irony, right? Maybe that's exactly what the DEA was going for. They know what's "hip."

Still, it's good to see that the DEA has finally stopped letting Rachel Leigh Cook destroy America's kitchens in the name of drug abuse prevention, and relaxed their rigid "Just Say No" attitude towards drugs. Now it's "Just Think Twice" which is two shades away from being "Maybe you should slow down a bit, man." Clearly a step in the right direction.

But, what's this "on-line" "magazine" they're talking about?

Stumbleweed presents marijuana information in a straight forward, and sometimes entertaining way. The topics contained in the on-line magazine address some of the misconceptions teens have about marijuana. Articles titled "It's Just a Plant: How Could it be Bad for Me?", "Hey Dude, Where did my Future Go?", "Totally Lame (and Dangerous and Illegal) Things to do on Pot" and "Rx Pot: A Prescription for Disaster" provide teens with facts and data related to marijuana use and consequences.

Here, the DEA is really selling Stumbleweed short by playing down the totally radical teen-speak. The actual article is not titled "It's Just A Plant: How could it be Bad for Me?" but "It's just a plant: how could it be bad 4 me?" That use of 4 instead of "for" could mean the difference between reaching teens in their own language, and being mercilessly ridiculed by them for sloppily co-opting "cool" teen shorthand. Thankfully, it all comes together in the final product.

Look at the dealer's hat. It's just like the kind real dealers wear! And the "chronic" highlighted in "chronicles"? Amazing. It's all so subtle. If I were a teen "surfing the 'net", and I stumbled across this issue of

Stumbleweed, I probably wouldn't even be able to distinguish it from all the other online magazines about the dangers of marijuana usage that I read.

Oh, and apparently there is only one "totally lame (and dangerous and illegal)" thing that you can do while on pot: crash into a stop sign that one of your (probably high) friends altered to read "Pot."

God, I can't wait for

justthinktwice.com to get a blog.

 
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