It is a dark time for conveniently esophagus-shaped foods, as an America still suffering from a string cheese drought must now also face the epidemic of a Hot Pockets recall. According a news release from their manufacturers at Nestlé, the lava-like sandwich approximations are being voluntarily pulled over concerns that these particular pockets had been stuffed with “diseased and unsound animals,” rather than the lusty and levelheaded animals one expects in their microwave snacks. It’s all part of a far more massive recall of 8.7 million pounds of meat processed through California’s Rancho Feeding Corp.—which is presumably where you will find the warm hearths of the Hot Pockets kitchen, where Hot Pockets chefs lovingly baste their buttery crusts stuffed with real, very rational hickory ham.