Ooh, girl. RuPaul’s Drag Race is back, and even I wasn’t ready for all the jelly that it brought tonight (by the way, this is not how I normally write, but it’s pretty contagious after two-and-a-half hours of the show, and I didn’t even have time to watch Untucked). But seriously, the show is a welcome addition to the Monday night lineup, since Mondays are usually a drag (no pun intended, seriously), and some lipsynching and wig-tossing is usually what the dreaded day needs.
I have tried to avoid writing about the show to a certain extent because it’s such wonderfully mindless (yet secretly smart) entertainment that I was worried that writing about it would temper the silly enjoyment a little bit, but Drag Race is too enjoyable to leave alone any more. Take the best of Project Runway and America’s Next Top Model, only instead of same-ol’ same ol’ challenges and clichés, add some actual parody, old-fashioned dirty humor and about 5,000 pounds of makeup and sequins, and there you go.
The new crop of girls was introduced to us in the audition extravaganza, which was most noteworthy because the season features three plus-sized girls, Delta Work, Stacy Layne Mathews (who looks the most like a woman out of drag of anyone I’ve seen on this show), and Mimi Imfurst. Mimi talked a lot of game in the audition episode about being “sick and tired of messy fat girls” on the show. She ended up being practically as messy as they come, but more on her later. I was mostly excited to meet Raja, the drag alter ego of Sutan, the makeup artist on America’s Next Top Model, whom I’ve always loved for his eye-rolling, sarcastic comments and walking-stick-like physique.
In the season premiere, the girls all met each other. My main bitchy first impressions were that Carmen makes a cuter boy than girl, and Alexis Mateo has a bit of the same mannish qualities as Jessica Wild from Season 2. Meanwhile, Phoenix hated India for wearing the same costume (“It’s so nice to see someone still doing that same old-school drag,”) and Mariah, who’s absolutely gorgeous, decided she didn’t like Mimi. Raja sauntered in wearing a big hat that looked like a flirty eyeball (I have one, too, but in a different color), and some girls threw shade on her for her lean build and minimal hair and makeup.
RuPaul arrived to announce that the girl with the most Charisma, Uniqueness, Nerve, and Talent would win the makeup and Absolut contracts, of course, but $75,000 as well (which is probably more than the budget for the entire first season of the show.) The challenge for the episode was “Christmastime in RuPaul’s Drag Race,” but before it was fully revealed, Shangela from Season 2 popped out of a huge box, to no one’s excitement. (I have to admit I don’t remember too much about her myself, so while there’s novelty in bringing someone back from the last season, I think wistfully of Jujubee, for instance.)
The first part of the challenge involved the girls shooting a sexy Christmas card by jumping on a trampoline and pretending to hump a candy cane while the Pit Crew, in furry underwear, threw snow on them. (Hi, I love this show.) What was not sexy were the little white socks some of the queens decided to wear while they tramped it up on the tramp. Raja, with her fashion background, killed the shoot and won the challenge. I also thought Delta did a really cute job, too, especially being a big girl who couldn’t get that much air on the trampoline.
For the second part of the challenge, the girls all had a bit of money to spend at a thrift store to make holiday outfits for the fashion show (for the shopping trip, I really liked Manila’s outfit, with the big flowy pink top and even bigger black beehive; Manila, by the way, when not in drag, wears an adorable little bow tie and dates season two’s Zahara). The girls got to work, crushing up Christmas ornaments and making it work with the glue gun (this show serves as a good public service message that glue guns are really hot). Shangela Laquifa decided to dress up a snowman (“This show is dirty,” my husband noted at this point as he passed through). Phoenix, who has a serious case of bitchface, and Venus both made sparkly blazer-type things. Ru described Raja’s outfit as “Christmas pudding at Vivienne Westwood’s on Boxing Day” (again: I love this show). Then, Mimi had a big fat messy crying jag because she was worried her Madonna costume wouldn’t fly, and she was so worried that she’d fail that she blubbered about it.“GIRLL! Pull yourself together darling,” mused Yara. My thoughts exactly. At this point, everyone figured Mimi’d be heading home.