Somebody actually made that terrifying bot-written Olive Garden commercial

Last week, writer and comedian Keaton Patti showed how bots can be a force for good when he said he fed 1,000 hours of Olive Garden ads to a machine and asked it to write one of its own. The result was an absurdist nightmare in the mold of Heiner Müller’s Hamletmachine, a terrorscape where the “pasta nachos” are “warm…

MIT scientists created a “psychopath” AI by feeding it violent content from Reddit

We’ve all seen evil machines in The Terminator or The Matrix, but how does a machine become evil? Is it like Project Satan from Futurama, where scientists combined parts from various evil cars to create the ultimate evil car? Or are machines simply destined to eventually turn evil when their processing power or…

A machine has learned to tell jokes, and they're actually pretty good

One day soon the robots will replace us in all things, whether we like it or not. They’ll be doctors and engineers and even artists and, though we may still prefer human expressions of creativity in this gleaming future, it won’t matter because the robots will probably have us living in rows of vats, sucking out our…

Westworld promotion drops extremely fucked-up looking robot in the middle of a pub 

As part of their final promotional push for the new season of Westworld, British broadcasting company Now TV decided to scare the ever-loving shit out of some poor Londoners who were just trying to get a drink. They did this by placing “Fred”—a humanoid robot that’s about as close as you can get to a real-life…

Anti-homeless robot covered in barbecue sauce, given well-deserved ass-kicking

Sooner or later we’ll all be bowing down to robot overlords, so it’s for the best that humanity humiliate and debase our future mechanical masters as much as possible while we still have the chance. That the machines aren’t in charge just yet was made clear when a San Francisco anti-homeless robot was pushed over,…

That giant robot battle was fake because there is nothing good left in this world

Earlier this week, a battle two years in the making was finally streamed live for the world to see. This ultimate robotic showdown between team USA’s 16-foot-tall mech, “Eagle Prime,” and Japan’s 13-foot-tall “Kuratas” was meant to show the destructive capabilities of these massive machines in a heart-pounding…

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Robot puts all of humanity to shame by achieving perfect score in Ms. Pac-Man

Recently, robots have become cops and priests, they’ve learned how to track us even when we’re not online, and they’ve managed to beat us at complicated board games, but now an artificial intelligence developed by Microsoft has managed to top them all by crushing one of mankind’s greatest achievements: the high score…

Spiders could eat you and everyone you love if they felt like it, biologists say

For years, the greatest threat to mankind’s continued survival has been robots bypassing our Captcha systems or learning our Pizza Hut orders, but our two sides now enjoy a tenuous peace after that adorable little girl taught one of their machines about the human concept of “wuv.” That means the human race needs to…