Taylor Swift’s new album has a track listing now
The Tortured Poets Department now comes complete with two LPs and Post Malone and Florence + the Machine guest spots
Missing 420 by 24 measly hours, the release of Taylor Swift’s new album, The Tortured Poets Department, has more or less overshadowed last night’s Grammys and her 13th win. Nevertheless, it’s all money to Taylor Swift, who has opened a merch store and begun accepting non-tax-deductible donations for those poor, tortured artists. Curiously enough, this also means getting a peek at the tracklist and guest artists on the album. The double LP features guest spots from Post Malone and Florence + the Machine. Additionally, a “24-page book-bound jacket with three handwritten lyrics unique to this vinyl and never-before-seen photos” will also be available for purchase, with all proceeds going toward refueling a tortured private jet.
Here’s the tracklist:
“Fortnight” (featuring Post Malone)
“The Tortured Poets Department”
“My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys”
“Down Bad”
“So Long, London”
“But Daddy I Love Him”
“Fresh Out the Slammer”
“Florida!!!” (featuring Florence + the Machine)
“Guilty As Sin?”
“Who’s Afraid Of Little Old Me?”
“I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)”
“LOML”
“I Can Do It With A Broken Heart”
“The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived”
“The Alchemy”
“Clara Bow”
Bonus Track: “The Manuscript”
While we all can’t wait to hear a 34-year-old sing “But Daddy I Love Him” and learn whatever “LOML” means, we’re more excited by the conspiracy theories such a release can hold. Surely, Swifties are on top of connecting the dots between Taylor’s exhausted expression on the cover and which of her exes is “The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived.” We’ll go with that weirdo from the 1975 she was running around with last year. Ditto for “My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys.” Maybe “I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can)” is her much-anticipated Biden endorsement.
The announcement of a new Taylor Swift record will likely shape whatever reality looks like this April and, more directly, the tortured bong rips department on 4/20. Perhaps “The Alchemy” will be the track that takes those listening parties to the next level.
The Tortured Poets Department opens on April 19.