Here’s what’s up in the world of TV for Tuesday, November 8. All times are Eastern.
Top picks
United States Presidential Election, 2016 (all night, everywhere): Last Tuesday, the World Series dominated basically everything on television, and tonight, the election—which is like the World Series of politics, but with more spitting—will do the same. There isn’t just one place to watch it—you can tune into ABC for Your Voice Your Vote–Election Night 2016 (6 p.m.), Fox’s You Decide 2016: Election Special (8 p.m.), CBS’ Campaign 2016: CBS News Coverage Of Election Night (8 p.m.), CNN, MSNBC, Fox News… In other words, your throat has long been swollen with the election coverage that’s been continuously shoved down it for the past 18 months. So reach down your gullet, yank out your favorite channel, and throw it against the wall to watch. It’ll stick. Trust us.
Weather (The Weather Channel, 3 p.m.): Say, that election sounds pretty gross, huh? Luckily, The Weather Channel’s offering a peaceful respite. Starting at 3 p.m., TWC will air nine straight hours of, in their words, “the most beautiful, awe-inspiring, and calming weather video and scenery ever caught on tape. This world is a beautiful and magical place, after all.” Yeah, until a dull-orange storm cloud rolls over the horizon, opens up, and rains down liquid tanner on all the majestic nature below. We hope that doesn’t happen, as The Weather Channel deserves some serious props for covering the election in their own unique way.
Stephen Colbert’s Live Election Night Democracy’s Series Finale: Who’s Going To Clean Up This Shit? (Showtime, 8 p.m.): The other best bet for unconventional Election Night coverage comes from Stephen Colbert, whose regularly scheduled programming on CBS is getting preempted for obvious reasons. Fortunately, he’s making the most of it by heading over to Showtime for his own no-holds-barred, Election Night special. There will be profanity. There will be improvisation. There will be male nudity (probably). The point is, Showtime gives Colbert an opportunity to be completely uncensored, and should appeal to anyone who thinks his current late-night stint is a little tame compared to his time over at Comedy Central. Political junkie Allison Shoemaker will be reporting live from the scene of her living-room couch.
Shark The Vote (Discovery, 9 a.m.): Perhaps taking a cue from The Weather Channel, Discovery’s providing a break from the metaphorical sharks by showing the best footage of their literal ones. From 9 a.m. to 3 a.m., viewers can tune in for a daylong marathon that pulls from the finest of Shark Week. Let’s hope it’s heavy on the Air Jaws and light on the Megalodon mockumentaries.