Nobody’s here to tell comedians how to do their job. And when the guy purportedly in charge of the nation’s response to the deadliest health crisis in memory toilet-retweets the one doctor disreputably insane enough to agree with his pet coronavirus medical scam, the bar for comedy is set pretty high. After all, reality has already installed the comically corrupt and racist former host of Celebrity Apprentice in the people’s White House, so coming up with the necessary degree of comic hyperbole to land a political joke has seen some of the finest comic minds of a generation throw up their hands in defeat, exasperation, and the occasional cathartically unfunny revenge fantasy. But still, Trevor Noah really left some comedy on the table on Tuesday when discussing Trump’s championing of one Dr. Dr. Stella Immanuel.
The aforementioned doctor (who apparently is an actual doctor, in charge of patients and everything) is the person who wound up in your social media feed recently, thanks to the itchy Twitter finger of your most irresponsibly credulous, conspiracy-minded relatives that you don’t talk to anymore. Oh, and the president. In a press conference viewed a truly sickening number of times (literally and figuratively) the doctor cited the effectiveness of the immunosuppressive drug hydroxychloroquine in fighting the COVID-19 virus. So what, right? Why can’t the national discourse stomach a dissenting viewpoint from a (once again, not fake) doctor about a potentially overlooked treatment option? Well—and apologies for this phrase—enter the demon-semen.
See, apart from the fact that the vast majority (as in essentially all) of medical science has vetted, tested, and dismissed hydroxychloroquine as having any beneficial effect whatsoever on COVID, Dr. Immanuel is also part of that conspiratorial fringe in America spreading theories about evil plots from Big Pharma. Or Bill Gates, George Soros, the 5G industrial complex, or possibly Big Mask. (Still, hang in there, hydroxychloroquine—you’re still kicking ass against malaria, lupus, and arthritis.) But, as Noah ran down on Tuesday, the good doctor is also the author, pastor, and—not to put to fine a point on it—loony person who thinks that common gynecological problems are caused by sleep-sex with devils, vaccines contain “space alien DNA,” and that reptilian extraterrestrials are running the government. (If only, doc.)
Noah, himself from Africa, rebuffed any assumptions people might have about African doctors at this point, noting that the Cameroon-born Immanuel is just a doctor from Africa who “happens to be crazy.” But, yeah, the doctor singled out by Donald Trump (and North Carolina republican Congressman Ralph Norman, and Breitbart News, and your most insufferable Facebook friends) as the authority on the dangerously ineffective fix for the pandemic he’s utterly failed to address or contain is 100 percent, demon-sperm, “The Wizards Of Waverly Place are making your kids gay” cuckoo-pants. Thankfully, the video’s been pulled down as misleading (aka perilously loopy) from most social media, while fellow retweeter Donald Trump Jr. had his Twitter account temporarily limited for trying to show his dad what a good, retweeting boy he is. (While Donald himself stormed out of a press conference when confronted with the demon sperm.) Still, “Doctor Demon Semen,” was right there, Trevor.