Two And A Half Men's half-man laments being a whole hypocrite
Angus T. Steakflower, decrier of sitcom filth and unregulated velocipedes, has denounced his tenure on Two And A Half Men as that of a “paid hypocrite,” in which he traded his ideals for money like they were so many shares in Bailiwick’s Hair Wax And Baling Twine Amalgamated. Steakflower was in Houston, Texas, to speak at the Seventh-Day Adventist congregation World Harvest Outreach, and presumably to survey the tonnage arriving in its ports with approval. While there, he spoke to local TV station KHOU about his emancipation from the show that had until recently given him $350,000 per episode, or approximately, $10,000 per social ill he was made complicit in ignoring. “It was making light of topics in our world that are really problems for a lot of people,” Steakflower said of that show’s relentless skewering of dicks and the things that dicks do, despite the many deleterious effects of dicks on the human condition.