In a move the network will surely come to regret once Donald Trump has been elected the 45th president of the United States of America in a landslide victory, NBC is joining Univision in saying “no mas” to the bellowing jack-o’-lantern of a man. The network has officially stated that not only will it no longer air the Miss USA or Miss Universe pageants—which are co-produced by Trump—but that Trump has been booted from his position as host of The Celebrity Apprentice, presumably in a meeting where NBC executives went around the table saying “You’re fired!” and laughing hysterically. (Trump previously, nobly gave up his seat on the regular Apprentice to run for president.)
Trump’s firing comes as a result of comments he made during the speech announcing his candidacy in which he basically called Mexican immigrants criminals and said that, as president, he would build a wall to keep them out. This led to top Spanish-language network Univision cutting its business ties with Trump, followed by some silly squabbling about golf courses, followed by the petition to fire Trump that led to today’s announcement. “At NBC, respect and dignity for all people are cornerstones of our values,” the network says in a statement. “Due to the recent derogatory statements by Donald Trump regarding immigrants, NBCUniversal is ending its business relationship with Mr. Trump.”
Now Trump presumably wanders the streets of New York City, toupee in hand, a man without a country. Alone, he is rejected at every turn when all he wants to do is work hard and make a better life for his three ex-wives. A more self-aware person might learn something from such a predicament. Donald Trump will probably sue.
UPDATED: As predicted, Trump now says he’s suing NBC, angrily citing the network’s support of “lying Brian Williams” and not him in a typically red-faced statement. “Mr. Trump stands by his statements on illegal immigration, which are accurate. NBC is weak, and like everybody else is trying to be politically correct— that is why our country is in serious trouble,” the statement says.