Unlike his peerlessly hateable “Hunchback of Notre Hampshire” Congressman Jonah Ryan on Veep, actor Timothy Simons made for a charming, not at all punchable guest on last night’s Late Show With Stephen Colbert. (He’s also been able to grow out his hair and a decent beard after shooting the show’s sixth season, which is a big step-up from Jonah’s “weaselly Lex Luthor” look these days.) Perhaps spurred on by his job plumbing the depths of the most incompetent, spineless, egomaniacal, gaffe-happy fictional politician on television, Simons, after regaling Colbert with some of the choicest insults lobbed at his alter-ego (“melted Play-Doh on a flagpole” apparently stung), turned his attention to the (Jonah, not Paul) Ryan-esque antics of Donald Trump.
Noting that, as a father of young twins, he’s become conversant in the ways of particularly incompetent liars, Simons suggested that his young daughter’s recent attempt at fact-averse deflection sounded awfully similar to Trump’s M.O., especially with regards to his recent missive firing FBI Director James Comey on Tuesday. Noting Trump’s unprompted and ham-fisted defensiveness (“While I greatly appreciate you informing me, on three separate occasions, that I am not under investigation…”), Simons saw a light bulb go off when his daughter, equally nonchalantly, started off a recent conversation with the disclaimer, “I did not throw my shoes on top of the garage…” (You’d better believe those little shoes were on top of that garage.)
Hmmm. It’s sort of like claiming without evidence (and without being asked) that “the election is rigged” against him when there’s a mounting pile of evidence that said election may have been rigged for him. Or that former President Obama was nefariously wiretapping him when, just on Friday, Trump tweeted a veiled threat to Comey about possibly, maybe having surreptitiously recorded their Oval Office conversations. (Comey remains unfazed at press time, apparently.) Or that Hillary Clinton had improper business dealings with the Russians, used unsecured electronic communications, and had compromising ties to Wall Street, when, c’mon. As Simons—a vocal Trump Twitter critic himself—put it, his daughter’s lies “are exactly as mature as the 70-year-old leader of the free world.” Which is a storyline that would probably be tossed out of the Veep writers room for being too easy and ridiculous a joke. Except, well, you know.