Eugene Mirman’s tips for opening bands
While it’s hardly a guaranteed ticket to stardom, opening for a popular headlining act is a sweet gig: You get the same exposure, most of the perks, and a bigger cut of the door than you’d ever get on your own, and audience expectations are so low, there’s nowhere to go but up. Of course, not everyone knows how to behave as an opening act, which is why The A.V. Club asked comedian Eugene Mirman—who will be warming up crowds before Flight Of The Conchords on their current tour—how to make the most of reflected glory.
Hanging out backstage
Eugene Mirman: We have five different dressing rooms, and a place where we make people wait that we never plan on talking to. There’s a room for beer, and then another room with the glasses for the beer. It’s a real pain. There’s one room that’s antipasti, and another one for salad—which they unnecessarily distinguish. They put the hot stuff in one room, cold stuff in another. Imagine, like, a Papa Gino’s buffet spread throughout a castle, with really dim office lighting. And then there’s the fuck-room.
The A.V. Club: What goes on in the fuck-room?
EM: Piles of fucking. It’s basically just a lot of beanbag chairs with people fucking on them. It’s very uncomfortable. As the opening act, I have to help put it together.
AVC: When trashing dressing rooms, do you start with the headliner’s?
EM: Actually, usually the only thing in your dressing room is a sad, crappy couch, so it would just be depressing to make it even more crappy.
Taking advantage of the rider
EM: I have my own rider, but it’s easier to get it done if you put it on the headlining band’s. So that’s where I put the roller-skate shoes, crossbows, the saffron. I travel with my own wok, so I need lots of spices and oils. I always need fresh wasabi root. I have seafood flown in. The expensive stuff always goes on their rider when they’re not looking. Nobody’s going to get mad at Flight Of The Conchords for having $2,500 worth of saffron delivered.