Gene Simmons, apparently feeling a little insecure now that he has some competition for the title, reasserted his position as Grossest Old Asshole Alive this week by pulling off a practically impossible stunt: Getting banned for life from Fox News for harassing its employees. That’s according to The Daily Beast, which says that a picture of Simmons now hangs in the security entrance of the Fox News building along with a “do not admit” notice for staff.
That notice was posted after Simmons’ appearance on the premises Wednesday, during which he barged into a staff meeting, yelled, “Hey chicks! Sue me!,” and, as The Daily Beast puts it, “pulled open his red velvet shirt to reveal his chest and belly.” He then started telling Michael Jackson pedophilia jokes and making comments on female staffer’s intelligence while hitting them on the head with his new book On Power: My Journey Through The Corridors Of Power And How You Can Get More Power, which, if you didn’t pick up on it from the three times the word appears in the title, is Simmons’ guide to obtaining power—sort of like Machiavelli’s The Prince, but for people who would take life advice from Gene Simmons.
This all occurred after Simmons’ appearance on Fox Business Network’s Mornings With Maria, in which he was asked about the allegations against Harvey Weinstein by host Maria Bartiromo. “The lunatics have taken over the insane asylum when respected business entities such as yourself ask guys that like to stick their tongues out what I think of Harvey Weinstein,” he said, which is fair. He added: “I’m a powerful and attractive man, and what I’m about to say is deadly serious.” If you say so, Gene. Go on: “Men are jackasses,” he said. “From the time we’re young we have testosterone. I’m not validating it or defending it.” Um, okay. Thanks?
He is currently defending his recent comments to The New York Post, where he said, “Women have a choice. They can dress in potato sacks, [but] as soon as they pretty themselves up with lipstick, lift and separate them and point them in our general direction, they’re gonna get a response.” He also advised working women to “get over your biological urges”—something he’s been notably terrible at throughout his life—because having children and a career is too difficult. Meanwhile, you can catch Simmons on the convention circuit, charging people for autographs as all influential alpha males at the peak of their power do.
CORRECTION: An earlier version of this article listed the Fox program on which Simmons appeared Wednesday as Fox & Friends. It was Mornings With Maria. We regret the error.