Happy Mondays dancer Bez gets his melon twisted, winds up in jail

Anyone who’s ever spent a day or two rolling on ecstasy knows that it absolutely saps your serotonin levels, to the point where even the slightest day job makes you want to hurt somebody. Multiply that by 30-plus years—and factor in a few hundred galaxies of multicolored uppers, downers, screamers, and laughers—and you have some idea of the everyday mindset of Happy Mondays hype-man and Celebrity Big Brother winner Bez, who was recently found guilty of assaulting the mother of his two-year-old son, kicking down a door and throttling her in a fit of rage because he believed she had stolen some money he’d earned from a recent concert.