Inspirational shark attempts to eat a whole damn whale

It’s happened to us all: You walk into a work luncheon or dinner reception or all-you-can-eat buffet and realize, immediately, that you are going to eat a shitload of food. There is much more food available than you can possibly eat, and there is no reason to contain your impulse to eat all of it, and so you make a valiant attempt. You plan plates accordingly. The first one is just sampling options, the second one is the proper meal, the third one is like revisiting old friends. A twinkle enters your eye as you ingest one final Southwestern egg roll. You wait awhile, breathing heavily, then go get a fourth plate. Then you hit the soft-serve bar.