Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

John McCain Only Watches Lifetime Cause His Wife Makes Him

Refusing to let an opportunity for some good panderin' pass them by, both John McCain and Barack Obama taped messages to air during last night's premiere of Lifetime's Army Wives, a show which is presumably about either wives in the army, wives of people in the army, people married to the army itself (not figuratively), a group of wives that somehow resemble an army, or some combination of the four. (I'm using my context clues.)

The messages of both candidates were essentially the same: we really should support and honor the troops. But Obama's message was a little more believable, if only because it didn't begin with the candidate essentially saying, "Whenever I watch Army Wives–which I only watch because my silly wife makes me. Believe me: I wouldn't be caught dead watching Lifetime: television for women. I mean, it's for ladies, and I couldn't be more masculine…."

You can almost see the teleprompter reflected in his tired eyes. If you're going to pretend to watch a show just to pander to its audience, at least do it all the way. The whole, "Cindy makes me watch it with her" thing just makes you come off like a lying politician who's passive agressive towards his wife and afraid of admitting to watching Lifetime, instead of just a plain-old lying politician.


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