“Let’s rebuild the Titanic,” says guy who’s apparently never seen the movie

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Australian billionaire Clive Palmer has announced that he intends to build a replica of the Titanic and sail it on the ocean, as history’s proven that that’s the least safe place for a Titanic to be. A representative for Palmer’s company, Blue Star Line, says that the new ship—which is modeled as closely as possible on the famous accidental bathtub—will be updated with all the latest safety features, an assertion which comforted nobody because that’s what they said last time, and then it sank.