It's the early afternoon on a very slow Monday, and the Golden Globes–with its promise of endless rounds of Dreamgirls acceptance speeches–looms before you. You turn to the Internet looking for a brief respite from all things faux-Supremes-related, and what does the Internet give you? Clip after clip of Jake Gyllenhaal in a wig on Saturday Night Live. "Aren't there other movies to parody? Other recent pop cultural touchstones?" you wonder, trembling. "Why the hell do I know who Jennifer Hudson is? Why have I seen the word "Dreamgirls" more than my own name over the past few weeks? Isn't there something else for people to get excited about?"