Michael Bay recounts how Sean Connery could shake down the "Disney Fucking Ivory Tower"

By Randall Colburn  |  November 2, 2020 | 4:26pm
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Michael Bay recounts how Sean Connery could shake down the "Disney Fucking Ivory Tower"
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Sean Connery and Nicolas Cage in The Rock Photo: Hulton Archive

We all know the rats who run Disney could have us all killed with a snap of their white-gloved fingers, but not everyone is subject to their cruel whims. In a new essay for The Hollywood Reporter, Michael Bay paid tribute to Sean Connery, who died over the weekend, with a story of how the legendary actor had his back on the set of 1996's The Rock.

After telling Connery the Disney brass was on his ass for being a few days over schedule, Connery offered his services. “You want me to help?” he asked, a glint of mischievousness no doubt flashing across his eyes.

“Cut to: Having lunch with the Disney execs in a third-grade classroom, sitting at tiny tables and chairs. We looked like giants,” Bay writes. “I announce that Mr. Connery would like to visit and say hi. Sean comes in, sits down across from the open-mouthed executives.”

He continues: “In classic Sean Connery style, he belts out in his Scottish brogue: ‘This boy is doing a good job, and you’re living in your Disney Fucking Ivory Tower and we need more fucking money!!’ Without missing a beat, they responded. ‘OK. How much?’”

Would Liam Neeson do this? Would Bruce Willis? Does this generation’s elder statesmen have the same sway with the studio elite, who, in Lynchian fashion, now only conduct business using code words in shadowy rooms? We’d ask Anthony Hopkins, but he’s probably busy making a TikTok.

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