Showgirls Sequel Somehow A Bigger Joke Than The Original

Showgirls is a tower of tackiness, a shimmering, smutty spectacle, and one of the most hilarious entries in the New Cult Canon—but, really, it left us with a lot of questions. Namely:" What the hell was that?" "Where can I get some neon palm trees to highlight the hate-sex area of my pool?" And, "When you think about it, isn't getting $500 for a lapdance a bit like someone dying?"

One question we weren't left with was, "Gee, what do you think happened to Hope?" Because, duh, Hope, the terrible dancer/stripper played by Rena Riffel, was pregnant and was going to move with the choreographer guy near her grocery-store-owning parents so that they could get a discount on baby food. Case closed, right? Wrong, because someone is making a Showgirls sequel that dares to tell the real story of what happened to Hope.

From Cinematical:

Marc Vorlander is the supposed writer/director behind this soon-to-be-gem, and it will focus on "Hope's brother's search for revenge following the stripper's death from a dose of contaminated cocaine."

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I know what you're thinking, "I hope there's a website that consists of nothing but a weird promo video of shaky shots of the Vegas strip, some woman with the Canon logo body-painted on her torso, hilarious lightning/space effects, and criminally bad R&B. Otherwise this project is clearly a hoax." Well, the good/bad news is there is such a website!

It informs us that Showgirls: The Story Of Hope will not have, how you say? Such good English?

Ah, the waiting is over! How longing we have been waiting for such an ending to the waiting!

But considering that much of the dialogue from the original Showgirls sounded as if it were poorly translated from Dutch erotic cartoons, this is just consistent with the Showgirls franchise. Also, Showgirls: Story Of Hope has a much better tagline:

"Girls hot like hellfire…Business cold as death"? Sounds about right.

And you can tell this director is serious about this project. Deadly serious:

Not surprisingly, many people are casting doubt on the existence of Showgirls: The Story Of Hope, calling it a hoax. Their reasoning? Look at how bad this is! It's ridiculous! And hilarious! Well, yeah, it's a sequel to Showgirls. Haven't you seen the original?