The American Psycho-inspired skincare line is a perfect gift for your special sociopath

I was listening to The Outfield’s Bangin’ featuring the single “Since You’ve Been Gone”—while not as successful as their 1985 debut Play Deep, arguably a more mature affair—it came to my attention that there is a new skincare line that shares my name and likeness which High Snobiety says “fortunately won’t give you a killer mentality but it’ll definitely give you killer looks.”

I am Patrick Bateman.

Browsing the website for Bateman Skincare, I notice the clean lines and modern influence on the company’s homepage, featuring a man, a woman, an axe, and a knife, possibly from Best Made Company. Diving further in, their products include a rose hip + seaweed facial cleanser, an herbal balancing toner, a zinc + clay mask, daily hyaluronic cream, and a daily hyaluronic serum. I believe in taking care of myself, and these products (along with a balanced diet and a rigorous exercise routine) appear to be a perfect addition to my morning routine—if a little too affordable for my tastes. According to John Squires at Bloody Disgusting, “it’s as easy as spending a few bucks and following some simple directions.” The products are available separately or together in a smart and restrained regimen attaché, which is currently sold out. They even offer lapel pins in the shape of an axe and a chainsaw that would look tasteful on anything from Armani to Brunello Cucinelli.