Or, “songs.” With Peacock’s The Amber Ruffin Show blessedly back just in time for Donald Trump and Republican accomplices like Ted Cruz (R-TX), Josh Hawley (R-MO), Mo Brooks (R-AL), Jim Jordan (R-OH), Matt Gaetz (You Know Which Party-FL), the My Pillow guy (Unelected-Sleepytown), and more to foment, lead, and direct a murderous but unsuccessful white supremacist coup attempt against American democracy, the defiantly ebullient host just couldn’t help but sing about it all on Friday. Look, just because there’s an ongoing, conspiracy-and-ignorance-fueled mob of seditious, heavily armed yahoos throwing a collective and cop-killing tantrum because the single stupidest, most incompetent, and soullessly racist dipshit in U.S. history lost a second, world-dooming term in office is no reason to let the flickering flame of your patriotic inner song-stylist gutter out. That’s why Amber pepped up Friday’s episode with a pair of sincere(ly vicious), tuneful paeans to those disappointed white Americans coping with the fallout from their failed and disintegrating white power murder party.
First, up, Ruffin enlisted her trusty sidekick Tarik Davis for the soulful schadenfreude anthem, “It Fills Me With Joy.” Noting that she’s not exactly proud that the sight of white MAGA seditionists making a cartoon shocked face when they realize they’re actually facing consequences for their reprehensible actions, Ruffin kicked of the duet by admitting, “I know it’s wrong, but, your suffering—it brings me joy.” So does her song, with she and Davis trading off verses about that one white supremacist terrorist having a screeching airport meltdown when he’s treated as if he were a terrorist with brown skin, or that other white supremacist terrorist removed by the cops from another plane while all the other passengers laugh and applaud, or that other white supremacist terrorist dragged off in cuff’s from his grandmama’s house. “I am filled with joy, and a little bit of shame—but mostly so much joy,” the pair crooned, before Ruffin broke it down by restating that, while it’s not her proudest moment to be literally tuneful at the thought of white morons’ lives being ruined because of their own, grinningly-documented, cellphone-tracked sedition, “It’s been so long since we’ve had any real joy, that, um—verse two!!”
But one R&B ode to righteous and all-too-rare comeuppance just isn’t enough in a 2021 where Donald Trump is scurrying off to his gaudy golf bunker, Mitch McConnell (R-Hades) has been neutered by Raphael Warnock and Jon Ossoff’s Georgia Democratic Senate wins, and president racist dipshit has just been impeached for the second time. That’s why Amber broke out the hand mic once more for a second round of contempt-honeydripping musical mischief, serenading those MAGA types who haven’t (yet) been arrested for their active or tacit participation in a white supremacist homicide-hissy fit, who are now calling for Democrats, Black people, and other non-traitors for “unity.” “Despite Everything That Happened, Let’s Unite!,” is Ruffin’s smiling, lilting “fuck you, you shameless, hypocritical, unrepentant crackers” to those out there who think that going back to the good old days when overt white supremacy expressed merely through evilly bigoted government policy (rather than hanging literal nooses at the Capitol building) was the way to go.
“I understand you don’t think I deserve health care, or a living wage, and your refusal to see me as a human being does not fill me with rage,” Ruffin began, before booming out a not-at-all sarcastic chorus of, “Let’s unite!” You know, with the neo-Nazi “Proud Boys,” and the people who’d “jump off a cliff” if Amber married their white son, and the whole “fuck your feelings” crowd who told soul-shattered Americans to suck it up at the thought of a fascistic, racist reality show grifter running the country. Rising to a crescendo of gloriously modulated contempt, Ruffin assured those GOP whiners out there demanding that the rest of us put aside the partisanship and our anger at their un-American treason, “Let’s come together and make sure you learn nothing, I wan’t you to learn nothing!” Now, in Ruffin’s spirit of ironic togetherness and healing, let’s all not send these clips to our more let’s-move-on-minded representatives’ Twitter accounts so they can sing along.