Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Things I Learned From Reading "How Vince Proposed" in Us Weekly.

Illustration for article titled Things I Learned From Reading How Vince Proposed
Advertisement

1. Jennifer Aniston always looks like she's giving someone the silent treatment, or that she's three seconds away from giving someone the silent treatment. (p. 56-61) 2. Vince Vaughn is, for some reason, an emotional wreck: According to "a friend" of the couple, "Vince almost cries whenever he tells the story of the proposal." (p. 56) God, why? 3. The proposal was made after a very traumatic event: "On June 27, as the couple returned home…after a romantic, nine-day vacation at

Girls Gone Wild founder Joe Francis' $25 million coastal retreat, Casa Aramara, just north of Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, the actor nervously got down on bended knee." (p. 56) Now the reason for Vince's tears is apparent: after spending 9 days at the mercy of Joe Francis, forced to listen to endless, disheartening stories that began with the words, "It was her 18th birthday, so I kept buying her shots of Jager…" Vaughn naturally started to question humanity, and turned to the only person in the room (besides himself) who hadn't physically assaulted an LA Times reporter, Jennifer Aniston, and made a vow to cling to her–for life if necessary–if that's what it took to get out of Mexico alive. 4. It took Brad Pitt six months to design this:

Advertisement
Illustration for article titled Things I Learned From Reading How Vince Proposed

Swirls are very difficult to come up with, though. (p. 58) 5. Aniston is not pregnant, and she'll blow smoke rings around you to prove it. "She was recently spotted smoking on her Malibu patio, nixing pregnancy rumors…" (p.60)

Share This Story

Get our newsletter