This Week In Terrifying Hybrids

By Amelie Gillette | April 28, 2006 | 10:13pm

Aux Features Hater

This Week In Terrifying Hybrids 1. Reality Dating Show + Creepy Off-Camera Host + Demolished 4th Wall = VH1's Can't Get A Date

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VH1 has totally demolished the 4th wall in this new reality show, but they forgot that there's a good reason for that wall: mainly, to prevent the palpable depression of reality TV contestants from seeping out of my television and pooling in a horrifying puddle on my living room floor. The dateless people on this show are dateless for a reason: they're very sad, and usually somewhat creepy. And the mean guy talking behind the camera, doesn't exactly help things. But at least now I know what David Berkowitz was hearing in his head that summer. 2. Men's magazine + Macy's + desire to compete with Martha Stewart = Maxim Living

Maxim magazine has started selling their own bed linens, comforters, and wicker hampers, so that the 14-year-olds who read their publication in lieu of actual porn, will have something besides NASCAR sheets to put on their beds.

Surprisingly, Eva Longoria isn't printed on them, but the guitar leaning on the bed is a nice touch. So manly. Like shopping for neutrals at Macy's. 3. High Fidelity + Broadway + Show Tunes = High Fidelity: The Musical

Yep. It's

happening.

And apparently, the producers are hoping that making a musical version of a movie based on a book that I doubt very many men cared about in the first place will lure younger a younger male audience to Broadway. Which makes perfect sense.