UPDATE: Wisconsin Senator Ron Johnson is about to get a ton of pork rectums in the mail

By Sam Barsanti | March 3, 2017 | 3:31am

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Although it hasn’t been as popular lately, a common tactic among fans who want to convince networks not to cancel their favorite shows is to mail in a bunch of physical objects that were somehow related to the series. Wisconsin Senator Ron Johnson is soon going to be on the receiving end of a similar campaign, but instead of getting a bunch of marshmallows from Veronica Mars fans, he’s going to be getting a bunch of pork rectums from Cards Against Humanity co-creator Max Temkin. Also, the gesture is not because Ron Johnson is going to cancel Veronica Mars. It’s because he’s a coward.

For those who don’t follow Wisconsin politics, Johnson is essentially a loyal company man like human-shaped worm Paul Ryan. He’s anti-abortion, pro-gun violence, and hates “career politicians,” despite the fact that he’s been one for many years. The specific issue that inspired Temkin to send him pork rectums, though, is a story that recently came out about Johnson’s office sending a cease-and-desist letter to a Milwaukee man who had called them too many times.

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There’s some confusion about what has actually happened, but going off of a Politifact report and a Madison.com story, we know that a man named Earl Good has been calling Johnson’s office multiple times a day ever since Donald Trump’s inauguration so he can talk to the senator about the Affordable Care Act. Apparently, he called so much—including one day where he tried 83 times—that the office sent a letter notifying him that the police would be notified if he called or visited the office again. Staff members working for Johnson confirmed that the letter is real, and though they wouldn’t say if Good really was the recipient, they did say that the person had been “harassing and threatening” the staff. They also noted that this is the only letter like this they’ve sent since the election, indicating that this is an isolated incident and not an attempt to silence dissenters.

The reason this story has caught on with some of Johnson’s opponents in Wisconsin, though, is that he’s been noticeably absent from the state for some time and has refused to attend town hall meetings with his constituents. This prompted people in Madison to hold an “Empty Chair Town Hall” where they expressed their frustration with Johnson and with the dangerous and destructive policies of Donald Trump even though the senator himself wasn’t there.

That’s where Temkin comes in. As he revealed on Twitter, he’s planning to send “one ton of inverted pork rectums” to Johnson’s office every month until he agrees to hold a town hall meeting:

Temkin declined to be interviewed by The A.V. Club until he has some fun photos of pig butts, but he did say that he is currently “negotiating with a Spanish hog anus provider” on international commerce website Alibaba. The campaign to save Veronica Mars didn’t end up working, but hopefully this pork rectum project has a better ending. Either way, it looks like Johnson is going to be getting some fun deliveries pretty soon.

UPDATE: It looks like there’s been a change of plans for Temkin and the rest of the jokesters at Cards Against Humanity, as they’ve just launched a new campaign where people can send personalized potatoes to Ron Johnson’s office in Milwaukee. They probably won’t rot the way pig products would, but stepping over a bunch of potatoes would still be pretty annoying. If you want to send the senator a potato that says “hold a town hall,” just go to this link and pay $5.