Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Westworld is only slightly less gritty when mashed up with Toy Story footage

Illustration for article titled Westworld is only slightly less gritty when mashed up with Toy Story footage
Screenshot: Nico Bellamy (YouTube)

We’ve always suspected that Toy Story’s Andy is a sick fuck. No amount of Randy Newman songs can soften the fact that, beneath the horrifying series of plastic masks that serve as his “face,” Andy is a heartless young man who treats his toys as nothing more than objects, despite the fact he must have heard at least one or two of their late night discussions on their hopes and fears when he’s supposed to be sleeping.


Thanks to a video from Nico Bellamy that combines Toy Story footage with voiceover taken from Westworld, we now have a clearer picture than ever before of just how heartless the cavalier human attitude toward living toys shown in Pixar’s films truly is.

In Bellamy’s Toyworld, Toy Story’s Jessie is shown waking up to the realities of the horrifying reality she inhabits, just like Westworld’s Dolores. A voiceover from Jeffrey Wright’s Bernard informs her that she “and everyone you know, were built to gratify the desires of people who pay to visit your world.” Our stomachs churn as a group of children smash the toys and a little girl dips Jessie’s head in paint to use her as a brush. Through Woody’s blank stare, a scene of him brutalizing Mr. Potato Head on command, and Buzz Lightyear realizing he’s part of a mass produced line of identical astronaut toys, it becomes obvious that Toy Story’s humans—Andy chief among them—are reprehensible monsters with no care for the thinking, feeling creations they so casually mistreat or abandon.

“These violent delights have violent ends,” Jessie says just before the screen flashes to show a mob of toys approaching the first Toy Story’s Sid to enact their revenge.

It’s a hint of things to come. Now that these fictional parallels have been so clearly established, it’s time to look forward to the inevitable Toy Story 5, which we imagine must follow in the new Westworld season’s footsteps by depicting a violent uprising against the humans who have thoughtlessly abused their “dolls” for so long. Presumably, scenes showing Woody’s smooth plastic cheeks smeared with Andy’s blood, roaring at the sky in anguish over the cruelty of the world or Slinky Dog’s mouth dripping with child entrails will earn it a slightly different rating than prior entries to the series.

Send Great Job, Internet tips to gji@theonion.com

Contributor, The A.V. Club. Reid's a writer and editor who has appeared at GQ, Playboy, and Paste. He also co-created and writes for videogame sites Bullet Points Monthly and Digital Love Child.