You just can’t keep a Gossip Girl down

XOXO, The A.V. Club. Plus: Resident Evil takes up, uh, residence at Netflix, and nice British people adopt sweet dogs in a merciless assault on our emotions

By Allison Shoemaker | July 8, 2021 | 5:00am

TV Lists Gossip Girl

Screenshot: YouTube

Here’s what’s happening in the world of television for Thursday, July 8. All times are Eastern.

Top pick

Gossip Girl (HBO Max, 3:01 a.m., reboot series premiere): You live your life. You chase your dreams. Time keeps on ticking into the future. Then one day you wake up and you’re old, and somehow, the Girl is still Gossiping. Here’s Gwen Ihnat on the return of a CW classic, this time on HBO Max:

Most Popular

Gossip Girl returns on HBO Max, in what is being billed as a continuation of the original series, still based around the fictional Constance-Billard School in Manhattan. While offers have been made to the original cast members, only one has been confirmed so far: Kristen Bell will again serve as the titular anonymous narrator. Showrunner Josh Safran promises that Gossip Girl’s new crop of favorite subjects will “check their privilege,” a seemingly wise move given the current dire state of the world, although that apparently means they’ll be taking Ubers instead of limos—what hardship! The cast appears to be more diverse this time around, led by the striking Jordan Walker as the cutthroat Julien Calloway (in what seems to be the Blair role), who decides to take newcomer Zoya (Chilling Adventures Of Sabrina’s Whitney Peak) under her wing for undoubtedly nefarious reasons.

LaToya Ferguson will recap, as is right and just. The premiere will also air tomorrow at 8 p.m. on The CW. And if you’re totally new to the Gossip Girl experience: First of all, hello, youths, and thank you for reading this column! Second, this show’s vibe can be summed up in a single screenshot from the trailer:

Have fun, you crazy kids.

XOXO,
The A.V. Club

Regular coverage

Why Women Kill (Paramount+, 3:01 a.m.)
RuPaul’s Drag Race All Stars (Paramount+, 3:01 a.m.): Coverage on this All Stars season is embargoed until 9:15 p.m., so look for our recap then.

More from TV Club

Resident Evil: Infinite Darkness (Netflix, 3:01 a.m., complete first season): “With so much working against it, it would be easy to assume that Resident Evil: Infinite Darkness is also bad, seeing as how it’s a throwback to an era that nobody wants to remember, and yet… it’s not. Nobody is going to confuse it for high art, certainly, but what didn’t really work in video games and what didn’t make sense in the Milla Jovovich-led movies surprisingly does work as a CG four-episode TV show. Infinite Darkness has room to get through a somewhat complicated plot involving multiple government conspiracies, biological terrorism, and a war in a Middle Eastern country, but it also doesn’t wear out its welcome by leaning too hard on the diminishing returns of bigger and grosser zombie monsters.” Read the rest of Sam Barsanti’s pre-air review.

Wild cards

Time for another wild card lightning round!

The Dog House (HBO Max, 3:01 a.m., complete second season): We bring you good tidings of great joy: There is a reality show about a rural animal shelter in Britain that goes to great lengths to pair the very good pups with worthy owners, and it’s back with a second season today. Gird your tear ducts, here it comes!

Genera+ion (HBO Max, 3:01 a.m., first-season finale): “What distinguishes Genera+tion is its very contemporary outlook into how these young adults handle their growing pains, using the technology, slang, and freedom of expression at their disposal. This doesn’t take shape right away, but as the season unfolds, the show slowly finds its footing.” Read more of Saloni Gajjar’s thoughts on this series, which brings its first season to an end today.

The Croc That Ate Jaws (NatGeo, 10 p.m., premiere) and other National Geographic Shark Fest things: Another one for the “okay, title, you have our attention” file. But this special, a part of National Geographic’s six-week Shark Fest programming, is also no slouch in the synopsis game: “From mysterious severed heads and ambush attacks to mob hunts and stand-offs, what happens when two of the deadliest predators on the planet go head-to-head?” There’s no trailer, but you can catch a glimpse of it in this Disney+ video. The special arrives on the streaming service tomorrow, as does Shark Beach With Chris Hemsworth, which premiered on NatGeo on Monday.

Grown-ish (Freeform, 8 p.m., fourth-season premiere): Zoey and co. return for their senior year in an episode that sees the gang head to Mexico. Because they’re not stupid-ish, we assume they’re all fully vaxxed.