That's a surprisingly reasonable price for the Ace Ventura 2 "butt birth" rhino

Now, a whole generation has an exciting new opportunity to own its trauma, as the rhino butt in question is up on the auction block. And for an amount that is, honestly, shockingly cheap: PropStore Auction, which is selling the piece—which was formerly on display at Planet Hollywood, where families could reminisce happily about a greased Carrey sliding onto the African earth while chowing down on their burgers and onion rings—lists its starting price at a mere $2,000, with an expected final price between $4,000 and $8,000. (Compare a recent Bruce Lee Game Of Death jumpsuit that’s currently going for $130,000—despite, when you think about, also just being a series of connected holes that a famous person once stuck his head through.) 

Admittedly, the practicalities of owning the rhino may be a bit more daunting than hanging up Lee’s old hand-me-downs in a display case: The rhino apparently measures a full 10 feet from tip to foam-latex tail, complete with an interior cavity you can sit in, possibly while yelling at your wife to just stay and talk to you, damn it, this was an investment. In one of the more pleasant sets of sentences we’ve encountered in a minute, meanwhile, the listing also talks about how all the ways the “butt birth” rhino—their words, not ours—has been restored over the years, including replacing many of its latex components with hard-coated Styrofoam. “Additionally, the latex butt skin sheet was replaced, likely due to the original being torn for filming.” Just luxuriate in those words, dear reader. Don’t they feel just a little bit like coming home?