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Arnold Schwarzenegger confirms he's returning as the Terminator, to the excitement of 1993

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Citizens of this, the year 1993, were excited to learn that Arnold Schwarzenegger has confirmed he will reprise his role as the Terminator, in a sequel due to begin shooting at Paramount next January. Schwarzenegger made the announcement to TheArnoldFans.com, one of dozens of websites you can “surf” through your CompuServe or America Online account, saying he was “very happy” that producers wanted him to star again as the killer cyborg that last thrilled audiences just two years ago, in 1991. Schwarzenegger’s sentiments were quickly echoed by many other people here in 1993, who briefly paused from listening to Aerosmith’s Get A Grip and discussing Lorena Bobbitt to express their absolute enthusiasm for the news.

“What perfect timing for this still-virile action star to return as the unchanging, ageless robot that has so terrified us in two awesome movies,” these flannel-clad 1993 denizens said. “As much as we’re grateful 20 years haven’t passed between movies—providing ample time for, let’s say, exploring political aspirations and then possibly getting into sex scandals, in addition to growing visibly older, thus potentially making this whole endeavor embarrassingly awkward—it’s equally fortunate there haven’t been two other sequels before this one that might have diminished any of our enthusiasm for the Terminator franchise. As we say here in 1993, this is going to be Da Bomb!”


Upon being told that Schwarzenegger had also confirmed he would then move on to doing sequels to both Conan The Barbarian and Twins, the people of 1993 hitched up their ripped jeans and slammed an OK Soda before agreeing that, yes, the time definitely seemed ripe for all of these things.  [via Coming Soon]