Aspen, Day Two: Lessons In Weirdness. Aspen is a tiny, perfect, little, fairy tale town that has been totally covered in money—so even on its own it's pretty weird. But during the US Comedy Arts Festival, that weirdness is multiplied ten-fold. Case in point, last night's party for Damon Wayans' movie Behind The Smile (I haven't seen it yet, but apparently it's about what's behind Damon Wayan's smile. I'm guessing it's sadness. Possibly anger. Or maybe more happiness and smiles, but that wouldn't make much of a movie.)This party was weird in several ways (mini-hamburger hors d'oeurve? Teeny shrimp pies? Freaky…), but mostly because Damon Wayans, Russell Simmons, Chris Tucker and Dave Chappelle were all there, and so was I. The highlight of the party, filed under Public (or Semi-Public) Drunkeness, can be found below. Later, Wayans, Tucker, Chappelle, and Jim Bruer all performed at Damon Wayans' Round Midnite, a show I only watched the first 15 minutes of before I went back to my hotel to sleep. (See, in order to stay awake, I need oxygen, which is in very short supply here. But don't worry, I've tricked my body to operate on only water, coffee, and free food now.) But the real weirdness happened this morning when I saw Joe Jackson—JOE JACKSON—in the lobby of the St. Regis. He was just standing there, wearing a cap with "Joe Jackson's Hip Hop Boot Camp" spelled out in rhinestones, completely unaware of the fact that seeing him anywhere is totally, unbelieveably creepy. I was walking with a reporter from People magazine, and the sighting naturally stopped us both in our tracks. She said to me, "What is he doing here? Go ask him why he's here." And I said, "If I'm going to ask him anything, I'm going to ask him something stupid." I mean, how often do you get to irritate Joe Jackson in person? I was about to go say to him, "Do you have a case of Joe Cola stashed somewhere?" but he had disappeared around the corner, like a creepy Jackson family apparition. Anyway, here are the stats so far: 1. Comedians In Puffy Jackets: So many. Too many to count, really. Chris Tucker, Damon Wayans, Louis C.K., Ileana Douglas. 2. Buzz: Whitest Kids still leads the pack, as well as Chappelle's stand-up performance and Louis CK's set from last night. There's a bit of Anti-Buzz about a few things as well, mostly movies like Funny Money. On a related note, I overheard Penelope Ann Miller talking on her cell phone yesterday saying, "It's a funny movie. We're here with a comedy!" Really, Penelope? If you have to remind people, it's probably not. 3. Freebies: Does bottled water count? I've had about 10. 4. Public (Or Semi-Public) Drunkeness: Chris Tucker being freaked from all sides by white girls at the Damon Wayan's party last night. He was surrounded, and totally hamming it up. 5. Anything Else I Can Think Of: Did I mention I saw Joe Jackson? And that he has a hip-hop boot camp? More info on that venture here.)