Musk, mouth dripping with bong juice, also announced that he will be “selling almost all physical possessions”—the farting unicorn mug, too?—as well as his house, which apparently used to belong to Gene Wilder. “It cannot be torn down or lose any its soul [sic],” he continues, meaning Wilder’s ghost has absolutely threatened to haunt his ass should anything happen to it. Musk says he will now devote himself to “Mars and Earth,” to which we say, please, go to Mars, there’s no Twitter there.
According to Business Insider, Musk’s meltdown is impacting his company as well. “Tesla stock price is too high imo,” he tweeted in the midst of this madness, leading to a 9.3% dip as of late Friday morning. This, of course, follows that episode from a few years back when he got in hot water with the SEC for making a weed joke while tweeting about Tesla shares. He settled a lawsuit pegged to that miscalculation last year.
And, because everything just seems to fall apart at once, his girlfriend, gonzo pop artist Grimes, is mad at him. And just days before she’s due to give birth to his child.
Grimes, we imagine, is coping with a hearty helping of spaghetti, hot dogs, and toast while praying that Azealia Banks, for once, sits this one out.
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