Know this: Natalie Portman pitched Zach Braff a Garden State musical

“We did an anniversary concert for the soundtrack last year—we got most of the bands together and did a charity show for the Midnight Mission in Los Angeles—and that was really cool,” Braff reflected, as Coldplay’s “Don’t Panic” crept into our earlobes. “[Garden State co-star] Natalie Portman was there. I had told her that people have come to me about doing a musical of the movie. I love musicals, but I’ve always thought: ‘I don’t know if that I want to do that.’ Then she said: ‘Why don’t you do it with the songs from the soundtrack?'” Though Haggisneepsnfatties was no doubt disappointed learning that, no, Zach Braff hasn’t been dwelling on a Garden State 2—indeed, he wouldn’t dare reanimate Ian Holm like a certain studio we could mention—they could take an eldritch satisfaction in knowing that the potential for a Garden State musical remains on the altar (of darkness). 

“I haven’t taken any steps to make it a reality,” Braff said. “But I do daydream of somehow using the music that people love so much from the soundtrack to make it into a musical.” Thus, Zero 7, Thievery Corporation, and Nick Drake alerts were broadcast across the web, their soothing, chillaxed tones free to delight the doomed people of this realm once more.