Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Girlfriends’ Guide faces some awful truths

Illustration for article titled Girlfriends’ Guide faces some awful truths

For all the parties the Girlfriends throw, a lot of them don’t turn out very well: They’re like the Mary Tyler Moore of dinner parties. Tonight’s is a classic, but here we really need to pay close attention to the episode title: “If You Can’t Stand The Heat, You’re Cooked.” Pretty much everyone gets charged up by something or other this episode, leading to some downright refreshing and tantalizing revelations. Yes, the show appears determined to focus on the boyfriends in the girlfriends’ lives for awhile, so let’s just put aside our ambition and inner peace and dive right in, shall we?

But God, where to start? Let’s go with Scott and Jo. For as much as we all appreciated their nice talk last week, and the fact that Jo actually had someone male there to support her, I have to say that I’m a bit smitten by smitten Scott, enough to approve this fledgling bakery relationship. Since Jo has people dropping or diminishing out of her life lately, it’s nice to have someone who brings lovely treats to her friend’s house party. If Scott can actually keep it in his pants for awhile, it could be amazing. All for it.

Scott is cute and hot and bakes delicious things; we can see what Jo sees in him. Anyone see what Phoebe sees in J.D.? The guy that finds it impossible to complete a coherent sentence when there are more than two people in the room? He’s cursed with crippling shyness, so obviously a social event like that is going to be painful for him. But it was also so painful to witness. And yet, Phoebe tosses a perfectly good gorgeous ex-husband (with whom she has two children, who were, at long last, acknowledged this week!) aside for this tongue-tied guy she’s known for two minutes. Sorry Ken Cosgrove, not buying it. Not even for the art porn.

Delia’s situation is slightly more interesting, because after weeks of seeing Gordon as the most perfect guy in the world (making it all the more heinous that she would cheat on him), Gordon finally cracks, acting all grumpy at the party and snapping at the hostess (Kudos to Abby for going straight to, “Let me see you out”). So now Delia appears to come all the way back around to staying with Gordon and, as Abby puts it, giving him a pass for his grouchy self. Still a bit confused here as well: If she didn’t really want to marry him before, why is she still sticking with hm now?

Best of all, Abby finally kicks smug Dr. Harris to the curb. How many of those annoying stories about tropical climates does he have, anyway? And that line about her not being able to fit his needs: damn. It was practically cheerworthy how she rightly put him in his place (“I don’t think I like you”), especially since he’s a doctor and she’s never hidden the fact that she’s a mother. A single mother, in fact. With many demands on her, way too active to be his passive audience. This version of Abby is much better than the one frowning at her phone last week.

Dr. Harris does have one point, along with everyone else: Abby’s odd mother-henning of Becca. With this episode’s awesome reveal at the end—that the baby isn’t Jake’s—I have a few theories to float around. One is: She flipping wrote the Girlfriends’ Guide To Pregnancy books, and as she said, she obviously loves them baby train. For moms, it’s easy to see how that could happen; I am completely happy that my kids are finally old enough to go to PG-13 movies with me, but my friend just had a baby that’s so sweet he makes my ovaries hurt. He’s like a baby commercial. It’s no trouble at all to get on board, and helpfully escapist and distracting for someone who fights frequent deadlines, say (like Abby and myself).


In fighting that deadline, Abby meets with the magnificent Jean Smart, who urges her to dig a bit deeper in her book chapters If we dig a bit deeper into Abby’s obsession with Becca and the baby, I think we’l find that it’s all tied to her connection with Jake. He’s gone, in Latvia, but somehow taking care of his former girlfriend and future son can help Abby feel close to him. Which might be another reason for Abby’s reaction to the episode’s hilarious, final reveal: The baby isn’t Jake’s. Now what?

Because if you can’t stand the heat (and nice tie-in of the heat wave to drive that point home): This week all the menfolks fail on that front, except for Scott, surprisingly: Gordon, a mogul, falls apart over a factory snafu; J.D., bless his heart, tries hard but can’t crack the social circles, leading Phoebe and Rolf to convince him to go incognito at his own opening; and giant baby-man Harris effectively gets out of Abby’s kitchen. Which is only a good thing. And leads to the obvious question: Since Abby and Jake might not have split if not for Becca’s baby (remember, they were on a pretty good track until that happened), does this parenting change-up crack that door open again just a little? Three episodes left in the season to figure it out.


Stray observations:

  • Sometimes I don’t understand what Scott is taking about with his kitchen productions: Was there some sort of sesame strudel?
  • Best outfit: I am neither thin not tall, but if I were, I would wear that light lemon two-piece dress Delia had on everywhere, like the car wash and the farmers’ market.
  • Power rankings:
  1. Abby: While a little obsessed with her ex’s supposed baby, she finally untangles herself from Dr. Harris’ mind games.
  2. Jo: Might actualy be on her way to a decent relationship with Scott. And, she gets a new couch.
  3. Phoebe: Turing down an advance from her uber-hot ex-husband because of her socially inept boyfriend of five minutes, J.D. Phoebe, have you seen your ex-husband?
  4. Delia: Nothing worse than bringing that guy to the party.