Here is the inevitable tape of Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey fighting on American Idol

Threatening to disrupt the dignity of deciding which of our finest amateur singers put the finest karaoke spin on whatever songs could be licensed that week, recently elected American Idol judges Mariah Carey and Nicki Minaj are already fighting, reportedly shutting down filming after a verbal altercation during auditions in Charlotte, North Carolina. The unexpected feud/absolutely expected publicity stunt has been brewing/concocted since Minaj was first confirmed to join the panel, with Carey unable to tamp down her feelings about Minaj no matter how many fistfuls from her $18 million salary she stuffed on top of them.

And judging by the TMZ video below, her constant undermining and criticism of Minaj came to a loud, shrieking head today, with Minaj allegedly threatening to "knock out" Carey and even "shoot her," and—as heard in the video and helpfully transcribed by TMZ—definitely calling Carey "your fucking highness," berating her for "running down her résumé every five minutes," and telling her, "If you got a fucking problem then handle it." Meanwhile, Keith Urban and Randy Jackson halfheartedly call for peace while reminding themselves that they also get paid to be there.