Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.
Pop culture obsessives writing for the pop culture obsessed.

Heroes: "Eris Quod Sum"

Image for article titled Heroes: "Eris Quod Sum"
Image for article titled Heroes: "Eris Quod Sum"

How did he do it? How. Did. He. Do. It? Howdidhedoit? How did Peter, who we've established has no abilities, fall seven stories and not get seriously hurt? It's incredible, because it's not even like he has any abilities or anything. Right? No abilities?

How did he do it?!?!?

Here's the thing, people: I'm getting really annoyed with this show. Because, bottom line, it thinks I'm stupid. It thinks we're all stupid. There's no other reason why they would always repeat what happened, right after it happened–verbalizing questions they assume we have, nay, should have, because these are the only questions you should be asking. Why else would Punchy McFearSnort have to remind us all that he senses people's fear? ("I know you're afraid, your fear is making me stronger," "Of course I'm strong: You're afraid!" "Oh yeah! Gimme somma that sweet, sweet fear, for the expressed purpose of strength." (Not verbatim.)) Why does Claire only do things when she prefaces her reasons for doing them, followd by a post-mortem discussion as to why she did them?

Because the show thinks I'm stupid.

"But c'mon," says part of me, "can't you forgive that? There's still all the super powers, all the intrigue…"

Well, no (but thanks for asking). See, in order to earn the right to be mysterious–to make me genuinely curious about what's going on–Heroes has to stop making everything mysterious. And I do mean everything, right down to nitty-gritty character details. After another episode, we still don't know what Papa Petrelli is up to over at the laboratory, other than working on the formula to do something with abilities. Ostensibly, figuring that out will be what ties everything together, but meanwhile we also don't know what Hiro's part is going to be, what Claire actually cares about–ditto for Suresh who just seems to like being around beakers–and what Parkman actually sees in that Starbuck-type–rip-off pixie. (Maybe it was the way she awkwardly kissed him, or their creepy side-hug.) Heroes couples lack of information with blatant statements of plot holes, and calls it curiosity. And more is only a text message away.

And oh, the superpowers…back in season one, they were a novelty. I didn't know what each new character was capable of, and the fact that a person existed who could collect these treasures was incredible. But now, dare I say it, there are too many abilities floating around. Peter included, there are three characters who have conceivably every power. And they use them (at least the telekinesis part) constantly. Is it coincidental that some of the best characters on this show–Bennett and Nathan spring to mind–have zero to only slight super powers? As the show I think said at one point, if everyone is special, no one is special.

So I watched this episode wondering just how dumb this show thinks I am, because these things were meant to keep me captivated for two weeks while I wait for more: Elle terrorizes the Bennetts because she wants their help (we always hurt the ones we love the most); Peter yells at his dad for a while about how he's going to take the company down, then he yells some more; Sylar is captive only because he doesn't have enough of his mother's love, then quickly betrays her; Claire needs to fix herself because soon "I won't feel anything at all"; Nathan's icy hot love triangle–to-be; Hiro still exists; Daphne has entered into a fake relationship with Parkman, and it can only work if she turns off her mind and refuses to think.

Actually, she might be on to something.

Grade: D-

Stray observations:

- Claire "read" about Elle letting out all the villains in Level 5. In…Primatech Monthly?

- Does Angela have the ability to enter other people's dreams too? I must have missed that.

- At least Lyle had his moment in the spotlight this week. Way to toss that water, bucko!