Finally uniting devotees of cryptocurrency with devotees of rapping clowns who believe scientists are liars under one umbrella of guileless faith, Juggalos now have a Bitcoin to call their very own. JuggaloCoin has been dubbed by its proprietors “The Most Insane Coin In Crypto History”—a tall order for a currency where nearly half a billion dollars can be irretrievably lost, all thanks to an exchange founded by Magic: The Gathering fans. But like everything Insane Clown Posse, JuggaloCoin’s “insanity” is a form of totally wicked, carefully monetized brand loyalty.
As outlined by founder Papa Nutt (whose ROI on ejaculation puns remains robust), JuggaloCoin is all about keeping it in the Juggalo family, ensuring every one of its users that their funds are going to someone who is “down with the clown,” and not to businesses whose positions on the clown are, at best, vaguely defined. In the short term, Papa Nutt is hopeful that both vendors at the annual Gathering and the official ICP online store will begin accepting JuggaloCoin, eventually to be followed by “Juggalo charities.” and soon, “the entire Juggalo universe dealing in JuggaloCoins.” And of course, there’s the more immediate satisfaction of “sending coins to a Juggalo in need,” as Juggalos reach out to their fallen brethren and supply them with the digital money to buy the “Fuck You I’m A Juggalo” sweatshirt that will lift them up again.
And while some might see the invention of JuggaloCoin as a slippery slope to illicit behavior, based on nothing more than a cursory reading of anything ever written about Juggalos, Papa Nutt says he is “deadly serious” about only using JuggaloCoin for legal transactions. Instead, he recommends using “a currency that’s the choice of drug dealers worldwide—the United States Dollar,” while reserving the JuggaloCoin solely for the transactions you want creating a virtual paper trail of your Insane Clown Posse fandom.